FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Feeling your messages are not going anywhere!

Feeling your messages are not going anywhere!

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

This one is mainly aimed at guys but all input is welcome, when your emailing a female or couple do you feel as tho you are putting in all of the leg work ie: asking questions and typing back long answers etc and they seem to be sending yes or no (very simple reply's).. I don't know if it is just me but I start to feel they are not interested but if they wasn't interested wouldn't they just say so????

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Probably just haven't got the guts to say no

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By *cottishrichMan over a year ago

Here and there

One line replys do nothing for me. If they're not putting any effort in I quickly get bored and try to find someone that is interested instead.

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By *ark EdgeCouple over a year ago

Stirling

The majority of messages we get are one liners, occasionally just two words. No effort put into the messsge and vast majority haven't read our profile.

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By *ENDAROOSCouple over a year ago

South West London / Surrey

"One line replys do nothing for me. If they're not putting any effort in I quickly get bored and try to find someone that is interested instead. "

Same here

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By *uteguy06Man over a year ago

Swindon

At least you get replies mate, my inbox is just full of dust lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If interested then my response depends on where I am: mobile = short response, pc = full response. Keyboard v keypad.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Know how you feel buddy,

I take it as there not really interested and move on

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

if we are interested we will message back what is needed to be said

truth is most messages are just 'how are you?' or some other crap we just delete

or messages from people who are not what we are looking for,it says in profile so they obviously havent read it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If i get message saying nice cock etc i do not go into long reply as no effort made by sender so why do different to them.

I try to send coherent messages to my victims i mean potential meets

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I find the quality of the response is usually proportional to the quality of your own message and how interested they are in pursuing a conversation!

I tend to treat one line responses the same as I would a similar incoming first message. It's an indicator as to how things would progress - not very well!!

But if you're sending very few messages aimed at recipients likely to be compatible then you should see less dull responses.

Quality over quantity, every time!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

never send one liners

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"If interested then my response depends on where I am: mobile = short response, pc = full response. Keyboard v keypad."
I agree with this 100%

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By *Ryan-Man over a year ago

In Your Bush

Would you say that your messages are promoting one line responses?

If the answer is no, search out somebody more interesting. You certainly aren't short of choices on here.

If the answer is yes.... Well then you have your answer.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

See these posts far too often now like, ffs just enjoy yourself on fab, i dont get why single blokes have to come on here blabbing on about the same crap all the other lads do, if a couple isnt interested you aint gunna be getting much conversation they are problys just being polite because if they didnt reply and deleted your message the post would have been about why your messages get read then deleted your a drop in the ocean on this site mate sooner you realise it the better

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

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By *oublewodkaWoman over a year ago

Leeds

Sometimes I find it hard to establish what is worse. ....a one liner or a copy and paste job! One guy sent me one with his last victims name mentioned all the way through. ...needless to say I deleted it.

A couple or a woman need to know you have taken a real interest in them, and by reading their profile you can tell what they like/dislike. Because if not, then that means that "anyone will do"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We say in our profile what we look for in a message and we tend to reflect that in when we reply. Courteous people in messages tend to be the same when you meet them, likewise one liner messages end up being people who are quiet and shy.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I generally use the persons profile as a template to structure a good message and try to show how I am comparable to there profile and I never send one lines as with all the single guys on hear the chance of a one liner standing out is nill. And trust me people not having the guys to say no is not an option.

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By *lackCherryCouple over a year ago

Bristol

We only reply to the people were interested in and i try (try!) to send a polite no your not what were looking for to everyone where not.

I totally disagree single guys put in the leg work. How many times ive found myself trying to put the leg work in i cannot count.. half of this for me is mental stimulation and its such a buzz kill when you get dull responses. Mrs

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By *lackshadow7Man over a year ago

Toronto

I loathe getting dull responses from women or couples that i happen to be in correspondence with. One word ones especially. I get bored of such messaging and let the convo die.

Some of them have ended up getting stroppy when they realise that i refuse to entertain their lazy replies.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

some peeps might not know where swad even is...i had peeps ask me where burton on trent is!

put swadlincote so full name of place slash burton on trent.

and maybe details of how far u would travel and when actualy free, evenings, wkends etc

but not many peeps seem be in swad n burton areas it seems lol

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By *lackCherryCouple over a year ago

Bristol

"One word ones especially. I get bored of such messaging and let the convo die."

Yup this.. I guess its top priority for me and i kinda know in the first few messages attraction aside whether its worth putting effort in or not

Same goes for general chat when i give my number out, i like to know how people tick.. Mrs x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I loathe getting dull responses from women or couples that i happen to be in correspondence with. One word ones especially. I get bored of such messaging and let the convo die.

Some of them have ended up getting stroppy when they realise that i refuse to entertain their lazy replies."

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I put effort into every message and it gets me nowhere anyway, never cut and paste or send one liners. I just put it down to cpls and fems having millions of messages, at least that what i tell myself anyway

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sometimes I find it hard to establish what is worse. ....a one liner or a copy and paste job! One guy sent me one with his last victims name mentioned all the way through. ...needless to say I deleted it.

A couple or a woman need to know you have taken a real interest in them, and by reading their profile you can tell what they like/dislike. Because if not, then that means that "anyone will do""

The great thing about multiple incarnations is that I have good recall for copy and paste messages. Now I appreciate that initially the message had a great deal of effort put in and the last thing these members expect is a quick delete

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The majority of messages we get are one liners, occasionally just two words. No effort put into the messsge and vast majority haven't read our profile. "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I seem to find willing, ready and able people, but when it comes down to it, they dont follow up and meet.

My only real frustration to be honest.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"See these posts far too often now like, ffs just enjoy yourself on fab, get why single blokes have mentalto come on here blabbing on about the same crap all the other lads do, if a couple isnt interested you aint gunna be getting much conversation they are problys just being polite because if they didnt reply and deleted your message the post would have been about why your messages get read then deleted your a drop in the ocean on this site mate sooner you realise it the better"

The amount of messages I've had from guys that just say hey sexy your boobs are big, wanna meet? Is just mental!! Sounds so desperate! Just have fun lol

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By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

Mine tend to vary in length, sometimes quite short in comparison to others, sometimes nicely long and satisfying.

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By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

it is feels like I having a conversation is like drawing blood out of a stone then it is not a person I want to meet......

they are not on my wavelength....

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By *audar76Couple over a year ago

Bedfordshire

I agree with most that's been said men and couples chasing a few single females. The single girls have the monopoly I think which means they don't need to put in much effort to get what they are looking for!!!

We have also found that lots reply but rarely follow up with a meet whether for a drink or a full meet after giving lots of positive signals.

I think too it takes a bit of normal chat to start to feel at ease but although a lot of profiles seem to say the same they don't give us the time to show that we are genuine, humorous and intelligent and not some fake bloke hiding behind a couples profile. It can all get a bit frustrating like you are so close yet so far!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I received this message today "great tits". I deleted it because a) he didn't attach a face pic as I have requested men do when they message me and b) it was an extremely boring and childish message.

Because I just deleted it, he then sent me a message saying I was rude because he had paid me a compliment!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I can't help but agree with the op, countless messages are sent, with time and thought taken on each and everyone, and to just see them deleted or replied to with such lackluster is disheartening but is sadly the way this site works. The single female is King and unfortunately many rule without grace. Kick the bin and begin again

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I should really add that messages like the one liners and so on do justifiably deserve deletion

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I received this message today "great tits". I deleted it because a) he didn't attach a face pic as I have requested men do when they message me and b) it was an extremely boring and childish message.

Because I just deleted it, he then sent me a message saying I was rude because he had paid me a compliment!!"

But your tits do look great

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I can't help but agree with the op, countless messages are sent, with time and thought taken on each and everyone, and to just see them deleted or replied to with such lackluster is disheartening but is sadly the way this site works. The single female is King and unfortunately many rule without grace. Kick the bin and begin again

Just because someone's 'preferences' in terms of age, sex, verified or not, or newbie status (the current message filters!) enable you to message someone doesn't for one second mean you will actually be of any interest to them!!

I allow all sorts of companies to email me with info and offers - and I don't respond with 'thanks but I'm not interested at the moment' to any of them!

There's a big difference between meeting someone's 'loose' criteria and them actually having any interest in/attraction to you!

And there's as many single females and couples struggling to find 'suitable' meets that actually fit their personal tastes as there are guys!

Just because you think you're right for someone doesn't make it so!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

well, somebody really likes exclamation marks! (lol) Obi, if you have another look at the op you will see it refers to the responses received from longer detailed messages. Neither my post, or the op mention anything to do with peoples 'right' to an attraction from sending messages. So why the excitable response?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I allow all sorts of companies to email me with info and offers - and I don't respond with 'thanks but I'm not interested at the moment' to any of them!

There's a big difference between meeting someone's 'loose' criteria and them actually having any interest in/attraction to you!

And there's as many single females and couples struggling to find 'suitable' meets that actually fit their personal tastes as there are guys!

Just because you think you're right for someone doesn't make it so!! "

This is very true.

We sent mails to 5 couples over the weekend, all of them have been deleted or left read but not responded too.

The search continues...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"well, somebody really likes exclamation marks! (lol) Obi, if you have another look at the op you will see it refers to the responses received from longer detailed messages. Neither my post, or the op mention anything to do with peoples 'right' to an attraction from sending messages. So why the excitable response?"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Blimey, Miss blond, all I can say is they're schmucks and it's their loss

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I was responding to your post - not the OP's - hence I quoted yours. And your post demonstrated frustration at messages being deleted without response - and an assertion that women 'rule the roost' - which they don't.

My response is the same as I'll give to any bemoaning a lack of reply, as well as any that claim some kind of 'pecking order' puts them at a disadvantage. We are responsible as individuals for our own perceived 'success', fun and enjoyment of this scene - nobody is superior to anyone else and the old argument that women are in charge and men are hard done by is just a commonly used excuse for people not finding their life on here or any other Internet based lifestyle site going the way they want it!

There you go - just the one '!' (Apart from that one.

)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

you do have a point but also make many assumptions on what I'm trying to say.

I agree with the op and am not moaning about anything else, I'm here to meet new people and friends and this is often met with such underwhelming responses it's hard not to be a tad p'd off sometimes. That's all, and as I said 'kick the bin and carry on'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It would be nice just to get some possitave replies. I dont expect a "come on then lets do it" but a chance to talk and see where it goes would be nice

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't send long thought out messages any more. Its just a waste of time. Quick and simple messages at least you only wasted 30 secs sending a message rather than 10 minutes :D. :D :D

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

just a shame that some give u abuse back

when they think i sent them a pict

i didn't

user is now block for sending abuse ie swearing

which is against site rules

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