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The most boring fab chat ups
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Are you asian?
In case the person aski has a thing for Asians? 
I replied
I’m Bsian
But they didn’t get the joke"
Tell them not to take it hard, it’s not a dick  |
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Wear a blindfold or close your eyes you won’t be able to tell the difference ...I so want to suck your cock ...that pops in the inbox occasionally....I could block single guys but then I wouldn’t get any mail x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"" well endowed, heavy cummer, repeater, free now.
You've never spoken to this person but he's like a check list for your free prostitute services  "
Haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"" well endowed, heavy cummer, repeater, free now.
You've never spoken to this person but he's like a check list for your free prostitute services "
At least you remembered it word for word. I’ve been copy and pasting that for years.  |
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I’ve had everything from
“Will you marry me?”
“I will ruin you”
“Are you busy?”
“Would you like to meet me?” (Try I don’t know, I don’t know anything about you yet)
“I want to r*pe you” (instant delete)
“I think I am looking for an older woman and your older than me, can you help me out? (By someone who was less than a year younger than me)”
Or the weirdest one was
“How would you feel if I asked you to put on some high heels and step on a fish to put the stiletto through it?”
Some weird people on this site.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hello Beautiful
I hope you don’t mind me messaging you but i took one look at your profile and i thought to myself “she looks like a lady who knows how to nosh a cock”.
I know your profile says you want to meet local men but 250 miles is really not that far and besides i’m in your area at least once a month. Would that be something you’re interested in. I can come to you. We can make beautiful sweet music in your bed, or under the stars, your choice.
I love having my cock sucked and rimming. Would that be something you’re into? Anyway, let me tell you i love nothing more than making a woman squirt on my tongue. Licking her pussy until she’s a writhing mess. Do you squirt?
Anyway, i won’t take up too much of your time. Drop me a line if you think we’d be compatible. I really do love the larger lady.
I’m very well endowed and have loads of stamina.
I’ve enclosed 25 pics for your perusal.
A reply back is always nice. But no pressure hah hah hah!
Chat soon!
Ps. Here is my kik, just in case, as i prefer to chat/wank/whatever on there
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^^^ this kind of message (not a direct copy from anyone before i get told off) is my idea of hell.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hello Beautiful
I hope you don’t mind me messaging you but i took one look at your profile and i thought to myself “she looks like a lady who knows how to nosh a cock”.
I know your profile says you want to meet local men but 250 miles is really not that far and besides i’m in your area at least once a month. Would that be something you’re interested in. I can come to you. We can make beautiful sweet music in your bed, or under the stars, your choice.
I love having my cock sucked and rimming. Would that be something you’re into? Anyway, let me tell you i love nothing more than making a woman squirt on my tongue. Licking her pussy until she’s a writhing mess. Do you squirt?
Anyway, i won’t take up too much of your time. Drop me a line if you think we’d be compatible. I really do love the larger lady.
I’m very well endowed and have loads of stamina.
I’ve enclosed 25 pics for your perusal.
A reply back is always nice. But no pressure hah hah hah!
Chat soon!
Ps. Here is my kik, just in case, as i prefer to chat/wank/whatever on there
————————————-
^^^ this kind of message (not a direct copy from anyone before i get told off) is my idea of hell.
"
Haha! This is great lol  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hello Beautiful
I hope you don’t mind me messaging you but i took one look at your profile and i thought to myself “she looks like a lady who knows how to nosh a cock”.
I know your profile says you want to meet local men but 250 miles is really not that far and besides i’m in your area at least once a month. Would that be something you’re interested in. I can come to you. We can make beautiful sweet music in your bed, or under the stars, your choice.
I love having my cock sucked and rimming. Would that be something you’re into? Anyway, let me tell you i love nothing more than making a woman squirt on my tongue. Licking her pussy until she’s a writhing mess. Do you squirt?
Anyway, i won’t take up too much of your time. Drop me a line if you think we’d be compatible. I really do love the larger lady.
I’m very well endowed and have loads of stamina.
I’ve enclosed 25 pics for your perusal.
A reply back is always nice. But no pressure hah hah hah!
Chat soon!
Ps. Here is my kik, just in case, as i prefer to chat/wank/whatever on there
————————————-
^^^ this kind of message (not a direct copy from anyone before i get told off) is my idea of hell.
"
I’ll admit
I laughed at 250miles |
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One guy said I made his girlfriend look so ugly that he could not fuck her like WTF as I would be impressed with that and what made it worse was he already text me the same 5 months before and again 6 weeks before what a twat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone really use 'fancy a fuck'?
I've had variations of most above but never a faf. Thought it was a forum in joke. "
Too lazy to type
Probably too lazy to make the effort to fuck too |
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Thursday's winner;
"Hi Sexy, I love your tattoos, I wanna lick them from top to bottom and make you drip. FaF tonight? I'm free until half 11?"
This was sent at 10.30pm from someone over 50 miles away, didn't specify which of us he wanted and never ever spoken to them before. Obviously we jumped at the chance
This week has been very tame on the novelty message front, roll on Sunday night around half one when some people start to get desperate  |
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By *r_PinkMan
over a year ago
london stratford |
Do you fuck on 1st dates? does your dad own a brewery?
can I feel your tits? or will you show them too me?
well you gotta nice head! and you look pretty honest!
well my face will be leaving in 1/4 of an hour...……………. I would like you to be on it! |
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You're going to drive to this postcode when it's pitch black out, in a deserted location. You must come alone. I'll come behind you and put a blindfold on you, and then you'll be mine for the taking. (insert graphic details here) |
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"Does anyone really use 'fancy a fuck'?
I've had variations of most above but never a faf. Thought it was a forum in joke. "
I've had it a few times. Invariably followed by a message within five minutes that I'm rude for deleting, or, did you miss my message let's fuck. |
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» Add a new message to this topic
Or any message at all, now I come to think of it. 
