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Fifty shades
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone rushing out to see it over the weekend?
Thinking of Saturday night but don't want to look like the only perv bloke in the cinema lol"
you’d actually pay to watch it?
i wouldn’t watch it if it was on the telly.  |
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What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
School |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
School "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
I've read the books and seen the first two films thought the books were marginally better  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone rushing out to see it over the weekend?
Thinking of Saturday night but don't want to look like the only perv bloke in the cinema lol"
prefer to watch bham city play  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Poor Jamie Dornan. Great in The Fall, Anthropoid etc but won a Razzie for worst actor in Fifty Shades. Watched first one with my late missus (she'd read the books) and only got about half an hour into it and said "Can you turn this shite off" - I happily complied. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't bother if I was you I spent £18 and lost 2 hrs of my life I'll never get back. The only good thing about the film was the company I went with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
i read the first book and thought it was poorly written, so wouldn’t even entertain the movies. |
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
I tend to agree with this.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
I can't read so watched the films.... in one night..... i was bored.
But have to see part 3 now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
I can't read so watched the films.... in one night..... i was bored.
But have to see part 3 now."
I read them on my kindle  |
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
I can't read so watched the films.... in one night..... i was bored.
But have to see part 3 now.
I read them on my kindle "
And why on earth not!
I am just thinking that there are some adults who do/ did enjoy the books and films but it is probably considered more fashionable to say otherwise? Either way, horses for courses and each to their own!
- |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
I can't read so watched the films.... in one night..... i was bored.
But have to see part 3 now.
I read them on my kindle
And why on earth not!
I am just thinking that there are some adults who do/ did enjoy the books and films but it is probably considered more fashionable to say otherwise? Either way, horses for courses and each to their own!
-"
I got the new one called Grey to read yet |
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
I can't read so watched the films.... in one night..... i was bored.
But have to see part 3 now.
I read them on my kindle
And why on earth not!
I am just thinking that there are some adults who do/ did enjoy the books and films but it is probably considered more fashionable to say otherwise? Either way, horses for courses and each to their own!
-
I got the new one called Grey to read yet "
Enjoy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I might write a book about an abusive possessive millionaire see if it does as well, in my view the whole thing has given bdsm a bad name, because people think it's a fucking documentary.
And it's totally un original, even the name was ripped off from secretary, Edward E Grey, the only Mr Grey worthy of holding a whip |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
I’m here
Love it, yes books were badly written but I still enjoyed them, loved the films and will see the next one probably by myself I really don’t care!! It’s a welcome escape from reality
Ms B  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
I’m here
Love it, yes books were badly written but I still enjoyed them, loved the films and will see the next one probably by myself I really don’t care!! It’s a welcome escape from reality
Ms B "
A few years ago people were bitching on here about how shit the books were. It seemed like most of them were just jumping on the bandwagon and slagging it off so they'd look cool- like on this thread.
So I read the books so I could decide for myself.
I think the books/ films are brilliant. They gave many women 'an excuse' to be sexual- they could say "oh let's try this like the books", without admitting they really wanted to themselves. The bdsm stuff is all consensual. It's a mutual relationship- it's not perfect but who's relationship is.
I'm going tomorrow night and I can't wait!! |
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"
i read the first book and thought it was poorly written, so wouldn’t even entertain the movies."
Same here... It was painful.
I'm quite an avid reader and hate to be defeated, so had to finish it. I wanted to stra*gle her "inner goddess" by the end of it 
Nita |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
I’m here
Love it, yes books were badly written but I still enjoyed them, loved the films and will see the next one probably by myself I really don’t care!! It’s a welcome escape from reality
Ms B
A few years ago people were bitching on here about how shit the books were. It seemed like most of them were just jumping on the bandwagon and slagging it off so they'd look cool- like on this thread.
So I read the books so I could decide for myself.
I think the books/ films are brilliant. They gave many women 'an excuse' to be sexual- they could say "oh let's try this like the books", without admitting they really wanted to themselves. The bdsm stuff is all consensual. It's a mutual relationship- it's not perfect but who's relationship is.
I'm going tomorrow night and I can't wait!! "
Yes it’s a consensual relationship and I find it quite comical in parts, it’s a love story but then I am a bit of an old romantic
Ms B |
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Read first book got annoyed with it as there is no continuity, friend then told me story of 2nd and 3rd book
fast forward a few years, female friend made me watch 1st movie after which I said I won't get that hour and half back... last month watched 2nd movie with a male who was trying to seduce me...again I won't get that hour an a half back...
3rd movie... if it comes on telly might watch it.. who knows I have no desire to watch it
All my vanilla friends love it esp the married ones.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im definetly not going to see the film.
I read a very small part of the first book because the women i work with were going crazy over it. I found it dreadful, badly written and uninteresting. My workmates sex lives/lives in general must be seriously bad if they really enjoyed the books/films.
I think its considered fashionable to appear to enjoy the books/films. Thankfully im not fashionable lol. |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Newbury |
"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
They have to get audiences for Jeremy Kyle from somewhere... |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Newbury |
"I will go .
I enjoy a romantic love story .
Books were romantic with a bit of a spice . Nice light read and helped many people become curious and sexually adventurous .
"
Nothing like a bit of emotional and sexual abuse to add "spice", eh? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The last 2 I went on anti Valentine's day with a friend. Unfortunately she's working this Valentine's so won't be watching till next weekend.
I preferred the book to the film's, purely because there's more detail in the books, but I think the film's have slightly opened people's eyes to a different kind of fun.
I can see why some people enjoy them and some people don't. |
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Absolutely nothing wrong with a bit of erotica for the masses as is often said sex sells
That said I wouldn’t exactly rushing to meet someone who thought it was seriously pushing boundaries unless they were willing to be educated of course |
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By *utie91Woman
over a year ago
Hitchin |
My play-partner is taking me on Tuesday.
I like the story behind it, but I agree with the majority that the sex scenes are badly written.
Also I agree with a previous comment.. that vanilla friends enjoy it... maybe it’s cuz they don’t get that excitement in their lives, where as I’ve lived fantasies that are more extreme and erotic than 50 shades haha |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Newbury |
"I just wish I'd written the books
Write a new one. "
Let's face it, it wouldn't take much doing. Just write about some non-consensual bdsm/sex set to a background of the toys of the stupidly wealthy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just wish I'd written the books
Write a new one.
Let's face it, it wouldn't take much doing. Just write about some non-consensual bdsm/sex set to a background of the toys of the stupidly wealthy."
Have you read the books? It is consensual.
The books aren't literary masterpieces, I agree. Hence why I said have a go. I like that she's made a fucking fortune from it all. Good for her. |
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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago
Northampton Somewhere |
I havent seen the first one yet!
I read the first book after some of the mums in the playground were raving about it. She annoyed me saying 'Oh my' all the time but it was quite a nice love story I guess. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Off to see it all being well on Tuesday, yup I’m one of the saddos that actually like the films, I don’t watch it for the sex though, I don’t know I like them really, she gets on my tits and his accent keeps dropping!! Actually just saying it now, WHY DO I LIKE THEM?!!!
Geeky x |
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By *llfoursWoman
over a year ago
north east |
I’m off to a lodge tomorrow night with the girls for my birthday. Usually go to the pub before the cinema to see it. I think we are all going Monday as soon as we get back (that’s if I don’t find a link online while we are there) |
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By *llfoursWoman
over a year ago
north east |
"I havent seen the first one yet!
I read the first book after some of the mums in the playground were raving about it. She annoyed me saying 'Oh my' all the time but it was quite a nice love story I guess."
The many shades of red she was “blushing” irritated me! Still a sucker for it though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I just wish I'd written the books
Write a new one.
Let's face it, it wouldn't take much doing. Just write about some non-consensual bdsm/sex set to a background of the toys of the stupidly wealthy.
I started the first one twice...gave up with boredom. So nope..nope..nope.
Have you read the books? It is consensual.
The books aren't literary masterpieces, I agree. Hence why I said have a go. I like that she's made a fucking fortune from it all. Good for her. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Anyone rushing out to see it over the weekend?
Thinking of Saturday night but don't want to look like the only perv bloke in the cinema lol"
It’s hardly perv material.
Went to first one with an fb from here. It was so tame we nearly got thrown out for basically doing a goggle box on it..... She eventually persuaded me to take her to the second one..... basically a dull chic flic.....we both fell asleep half way through!
It will take a lot of “persuading” to see the third one....though I don’t think she wants too either! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
I’m here
Love it, yes books were badly written but I still enjoyed them, loved the films and will see the next one probably by myself I really don’t care!! It’s a welcome escape from reality
Ms B
A few years ago people were bitching on here about how shit the books were. It seemed like most of them were just jumping on the bandwagon and slagging it off so they'd look cool- like on this thread.
So I read the books so I could decide for myself.
I think the books/ films are brilliant. They gave many women 'an excuse' to be sexual- they could say "oh let's try this like the books", without admitting they really wanted to themselves. The bdsm stuff is all consensual. It's a mutual relationship- it's not perfect but who's relationship is.
I'm going tomorrow night and I can't wait!! "
I totally agree with you carrot lady !
We’re going together Sunday night and are really looking forward to it |
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"I just wish I'd written the books "
so does e l James.
They're bad in every way; unoriginal, semi literate at best and shot through with examples of consent violations. And that's long before I get started on the tired trope of grey as somehow being a dom because he's damaged by his childhood.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
I’m here
Love it, yes books were badly written but I still enjoyed them, loved the films and will see the next one probably by myself I really don’t care!! It’s a welcome escape from reality
Ms B
A few years ago people were bitching on here about how shit the books were. It seemed like most of them were just jumping on the bandwagon and slagging it off so they'd look cool- like on this thread.
So I read the books so I could decide for myself.
I think the books/ films are brilliant. They gave many women 'an excuse' to be sexual- they could say "oh let's try this like the books", without admitting they really wanted to themselves. The bdsm stuff is all consensual. It's a mutual relationship- it's not perfect but who's relationship is.
I'm going tomorrow night and I can't wait!!
I totally agree with you carrot lady !
We’re going together Sunday night and are really looking forward to it "
It was brilliant!! I never finished reading the 3rd book so it was really good as I didn't know what was going to happen.
Totally consensual all the way through. He owned her but she also owned him.
People think he was the bad guy but they fixed each other. 
She became feisty and strong because of him. |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Newbury |
"I just wish I'd written the books
Write a new one.
Let's face it, it wouldn't take much doing. Just write about some non-consensual bdsm/sex set to a background of the toys of the stupidly wealthy.
Have you read the books? It is consensual.
The books aren't literary masterpieces, I agree. Hence why I said have a go. I like that she's made a fucking fortune from it all. Good for her. "
No they aren't - she never signs his contract - BDSMers have been going on about it for ages. He manipulates her into doing things she doesn't want to.
It is oft said that if it were set in a trailer park, it would be a horror film. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
Me Rebecca loved the books and the film  |
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"
Totally consensual all the way through. He owned her but she also owned him.
People think he was the bad guy but they fixed each other.
She became feisty and strong because of him. "
I have not see it (them) but I think I will now and I understand from a friend that was precisely it... She became strong because of him and they fixed each other. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's a nice love storie but did think it was too hyped up on the bdsm side as i thought it was too tame compared to other good books I have read in the passed . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Totally consensual all the way through. He owned her but she also owned him.
People think he was the bad guy but they fixed each other.
She became feisty and strong because of him.
I have not see it (them) but I think I will now and I understand from a friend that was precisely it... She became strong because of him and they fixed each other. "
The last thing he says to her is brilliant. I might even go see it again. |
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"I might write a book about an abusive possessive millionaire see if it does as well, in my view the whole thing has given bdsm a bad name, because people think it's a fucking documentary.
And it's totally un original, even the name was ripped off from secretary, Edward E Grey, the only Mr Grey worthy of holding a whip "
Totally agree with you here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
Has no correlation to item being bad or good. More to do with a void in a market and exploitation of those with little imagination and literary appreciation.
One can sell anything if it's advertised correctly to a certain target group. Whether good or not. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a nice love storie but did think it was too hyped up on the bdsm side as i thought it was too tame compared to other good books I have read in the passed ."
I heard it's more psychological abuse and manipulation, rather than any 'love' story from a lady friend. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What concerns me in this thread are those who are calling this story a love story. Really? He gets he her d*unk, pushes her past her comfort zones, stalks her, in short he is an abusive narcissist.
"She becomes feisty because of him" what else was she going to do? I can hardly see the franchise doing as well if it ended with Anastasia ending up needing counselling or taking her own life.
She repeatedly thinks Christian will change, a foolish possibly even deadly mistake.
People like this DO NOT change for the better.
If you're gut instinct says something is wrong. Trust it.
For those who are interested there is a lengthier breakdown at the end of my profile. |
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"Im definetly not going to see the film.
I read a very small part of the first book because the women i work with were going crazy over it. I found it dreadful, badly written and uninteresting. My workmates sex lives/lives in general must be seriously bad if they really enjoyed the books/films.
I think its considered fashionable to appear to enjoy the books/films. Thankfully im not fashionable lol."
Same here. So badly written it hurt my head!! Gave up after a couple of dozen pages.
Most of the people I know who like them are very vanilla, married, kids & it gives them a fantasy to indulge in without indulging. I get more than enough excitement to not need the additional ‘fantasy escape’ from it!
But if we were all the same, it’d be a dull world!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I love reading and read the three books in a week or two, but was bored towards the end of the second, but finished what I started.
Given that EL James is a journalist and Anastasia was an English student, the books were poorly written, yes they were readable in the fact that they passed the time, but they left me no desire to watch the films.
I know little about BDSM, but I think it portrayed it in a bad light. Anastasia would never have considered a foray into that lifestyle if Christian was actually Steve from the deli counter.
Ginger |
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By *anther PurrrsWoman
over a year ago
the Shadows Purrring or Roaring |
"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
They’re now on Fab lmao |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
"
Mr Blobby made it to Christmas Number 1. I rest my case |
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
They’re now on Fab lmao "
Ace |
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
Mr Blobby made it to Christmas Number 1. I rest my case "
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"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
Has no correlation to item being bad or good. More to do with a void in a market and exploitation of those with little imagination and literary appreciation.
One can sell anything if it's advertised correctly to a certain target group. Whether good or not."
I think you have a point there - there was a void and it fills that void at least for some. I think it has the achieved that people even in the vanilla world outside Fabs talk about BDMS more openly - that is good in my opinion. |
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By *anther PurrrsWoman
over a year ago
the Shadows Purrring or Roaring |
"What surprises me is the sheer number of people dismissing the books and the films... but they were a tremendous success.
So where are all the guys and girls who did read/ watch/ enjoy and made the success possible - just a thought...
Has no correlation to item being bad or good. More to do with a void in a market and exploitation of those with little imagination and literary appreciation.
One can sell anything if it's advertised correctly to a certain target group. Whether good or not.I think you have a point there - there was a void and it fills that void at least for some. I think it has the achieved that people even in the vanilla world outside Fabs talk about BDMS more openly - that is good in my opinion."
Very valid and think awoke the dark side in some to explore and pursue further.... |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Newbury |
"What concerns me in this thread are those who are calling this story a love story. Really? He gets he her d*unk, pushes her past her comfort zones, stalks her, in short he is an abusive narcissist.
"She becomes feisty because of him" what else was she going to do? I can hardly see the franchise doing as well if it ended with Anastasia ending up needing counselling or taking her own life.
She repeatedly thinks Christian will change, a foolish possibly even deadly mistake.
People like this DO NOT change for the better.
If you're gut instinct says something is wrong. Trust it.
For those who are interested there is a lengthier breakdown at the end of my profile."
But apparently if it's a wealthy, well dressed guy who is the abuser, it's just "spicy".... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"They gave many women 'an excuse' to be sexual- they could say "oh let's try this like the books", without admitting they really wanted to themselves.
The bdsm stuff is all consensual. It's a mutual relationship- it's not perfect but who's relationship is."
The vast majority of BDSM practitioners I've spoken to are adamant that 'trying it like it's in the books' is the LAST thing that you should be doing.
FSOG is written by someone whose knowledge of BDSM is based on little more than two-bit bodice-ripper novels, cheap porno flicks and horror fanfics...
As people have already said, Christian is possibly the WORST literary model for BDSM practice. He breaks virtually every single rule going with respect to consent...he's basically using BDSM as a lampshade for abusive practices...
Rather than 'mainstreaming' BDSM, the FSOG franchise has encouraged people to experiment with BDSM without giving ANY thought whatever to ANY established safety protocols, and reinforced the stereotypical view of BDSM as a violent, dangerous, mysogynist and abusive subculture.
Moreover, it's flooded BDSM-related sites with poorly-informed newbies who think that they're experts on the subject just because they've read the books and seen the movies... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do yourself a favour, go read some Anais Nin
Maybe start with Delta of Venus or Little Birds
"
Are you addressing me?
Just that your post immediately follows mine, but it's not directed at anyone specifically... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A general recommendation to anyone with an interest in erotic fiction Jersey Person. "
Well, as an amateur erotic author myself, I'll certainly take a look...
Are they particularly BDSM-heavy stories? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What concerns me in this thread are those who are calling this story a love story. Really? He gets he her d*unk, pushes her past her comfort zones, stalks her, in short he is an abusive narcissist.
"She becomes feisty because of him" what else was she going to do? I can hardly see the franchise doing as well if it ended with Anastasia ending up needing counselling or taking her own life.
She repeatedly thinks Christian will change, a foolish possibly even deadly mistake.
People like this DO NOT change for the better.
If you're gut instinct says something is wrong. Trust it.
For those who are interested there is a lengthier breakdown at the end of my profile.
But apparently if it's a wealthy, well dressed guy who is the abuser, it's just "spicy"...."
Agreed if a regular person did as Christian had, it would result in at very least them being escorted from the mothers home, in the back of a police car.
E L James did naff all research into the world of BDSM leading to a misrepresentation. If she had done this to a religion or race they'd have sued her.
People seem to be getting off on the whole spanking part and the fact its apparently erotic fiction, glossing over the fighting and stalking part.
He openly admits to having had "a rough start in life" as if this is his validation to belittle and abuse others.
The first film has about 20 mins of sex in it out of a two hour film.
- I dunno about you but I'd be flipping disappointed if that was all he had to offer. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Not me... Crap films... Seen better acted sensuality and sex in my Granny's front room "
Last girlfriend bullied me to watch watch the first one. I lost interest after about five minutes and flicked through it, stopped watching it cause it was that bad.
Secretary was a way better film. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"They gave many women 'an excuse' to be sexual- they could say "oh let's try this like the books", without admitting they really wanted to themselves.
The bdsm stuff is all consensual. It's a mutual relationship- it's not perfect but who's relationship is.
The vast majority of BDSM practitioners I've spoken to are adamant that 'trying it like it's in the books' is the LAST thing that you should be doing.
FSOG is written by someone whose knowledge of BDSM is based on little more than two-bit bodice-ripper novels, cheap porno flicks and horror fanfics...
As people have already said, Christian is possibly the WORST literary model for BDSM practice. He breaks virtually every single rule going with respect to consent...he's basically using BDSM as a lampshade for abusive practices...
Rather than 'mainstreaming' BDSM, the FSOG franchise has encouraged people to experiment with BDSM without giving ANY thought whatever to ANY established safety protocols, and reinforced the stereotypical view of BDSM as a violent, dangerous, mysogynist and abusive subculture.
Moreover, it's flooded BDSM-related sites with poorly-informed newbies who think that they're experts on the subject just because they've read the books and seen the movies..."
BDSM for the elitists. No newbies allowed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"E L James did naff all research into the world of BDSM leading to a misrepresentation. If she had done this to a religion or race they'd have sued her"
Exactly my point.
Admittedly, I've only been in the BDSM scene for about 3.5 years, but almost everyone I've spoken to regarding FSOG has said the same thing...it's about as genuine a portrayal of BDSM as John Wayne's films were an accurate portrayal of WWII...
If you enjoy reading the books or watching the films, that's fine...but if you're going to use them as guidelines for 'real life' BDSM practice, I won't consider you to be a safe play-partner.
If you want to learn about BDSM, talk to people in the scene, go to munches, go to clubs, attend events and presentations...DON'T rely on sensationalised Hollywood dramas that are designed for one thing only...MAKING MONEY |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"BDSM for the elitists. No newbies allowed. "
Where did I say 'no newbies allowed'?
My complaint is not with 'newbies' in general.
I was criticising a specific type of 'newbie'...the type who, having read FSOG and/or watched the movies, assume that they are experts in all aspects of BDSM and kink, and have no need to listen to more experienced members of the community, or learn about basic safety, consent, red flags, safewords, etc...
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"BDSM for the elitists. No newbies allowed.
Where did I say 'no newbies allowed'?
My complaint is not with 'newbies' in general.
I was criticising a specific type of 'newbie'...the type who, having read FSOG and/or watched the movies, assume that they are experts in all aspects of BDSM and kink, and have no need to listen to more experienced members of the community, or learn about basic safety, consent, red flags, safewords, etc...
"
Apologies then. Agree some are naïve. But no-one was born an expert. (He ignored her safe word and she fucked off. She defied him a few times but on purpose and enjoyed the 'consequences'.)
Probably the same people that would watch Spiderman and think they can fly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What concerns me in this thread are those who are calling this story a love story. Really? He gets he her d*unk, pushes her past her comfort zones, stalks her, in short he is an abusive narcissist.
"She becomes feisty because of him" what else was she going to do? I can hardly see the franchise doing as well if it ended with Anastasia ending up needing counselling or taking her own life.
She repeatedly thinks Christian will change, a foolish possibly even deadly mistake.
People like this DO NOT change for the better.
If you're gut instinct says something is wrong. Trust it.
For those who are interested there is a lengthier breakdown at the end of my profile."
Hi Madison,
Just read your profile, your analysis is spot on. I'd go further and call Christian Grey a malignant narcissist. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"E L James did naff all research into the world of BDSM leading to a misrepresentation. If she had done this to a religion or race they'd have sued her.
Exactly my point.
Admittedly, I've only been in the BDSM scene for about 3.5 years, but almost everyone I've spoken to regarding FSOG has said the same thing...it's about as genuine a portrayal of BDSM as John Wayne's films were an accurate portrayal of WWII...
If you enjoy reading the books or watching the films, that's fine...but if you're going to use them as guidelines for 'real life' BDSM practice, I won't consider you to be a safe play-partner.
If you want to learn about BDSM, talk to people in the scene, go to munches, go to clubs, attend events and presentations...DON'T rely on sensationalised Hollywood dramas that are designed for one thing only...MAKING MONEY"
I think the analogy of not using 50 shades to wipe my derriere on sums up my thoughts. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What concerns me in this thread are those who are calling this story a love story. Really? He gets he her d*unk, pushes her past her comfort zones, stalks her, in short he is an abusive narcissist.
"She becomes feisty because of him" what else was she going to do? I can hardly see the franchise doing as well if it ended with Anastasia ending up needing counselling or taking her own life.
She repeatedly thinks Christian will change, a foolish possibly even deadly mistake.
People like this DO NOT change for the better.
If you're gut instinct says something is wrong. Trust it.
For those who are interested there is a lengthier breakdown at the end of my profile."
Which of the books did you read? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What concerns me in this thread are those who are calling this story a love story. Really? He gets he her d*unk, pushes her past her comfort zones, stalks her, in short he is an abusive narcissist.
"She becomes feisty because of him" what else was she going to do? I can hardly see the franchise doing as well if it ended with Anastasia ending up needing counselling or taking her own life.
She repeatedly thinks Christian will change, a foolish possibly even deadly mistake.
People like this DO NOT change for the better.
If you're gut instinct says something is wrong. Trust it.
For those who are interested there is a lengthier breakdown at the end of my profile.
Hi Madison,
Just read your profile, your analysis is spot on. I'd go further and call Christian Grey a malignant narcissist. "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Can I just say something.. it's just a film. It's not real and if it normalises BDSM (in any way shape or form, even if it is done badly which we all know to be true ) then it can only be a good thing.
Plus you can't deny Jamie Dornan is worth the watch alone
P x |
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By *imiUKMan
over a year ago
Newbury |
Actually, I suppose that FSOG is a love story - the love that humanity has for money.
Christian is fabulously wealthy and has clearly had to suppress many human traits to accumulate his wealth.
Anastasia's struggle is how far she is willing to abandon her sense of self to gain access to Christian's money. The car is the perfect metaphor. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Actually, I suppose that FSOG is a love story - the love that humanity has for money.
Christian is fabulously wealthy and has clearly had to suppress many human traits to accumulate his wealth.
Anastasia's struggle is how far she is willing to abandon her sense of self to gain access to Christian's money. The car is the perfect metaphor."
You really think she wanted his cash? That's not how I saw it at all.
I saw a film where she fell for a guy, he happened to have money. She dumped him because he was a dick, then he decided to stop being such a nob and they got married.
Not exactly Mills and Boon but watchable just for the fact people can change if they find the right person, if they love them enough. But what do I know... he could possibly go back to being a nob again and she's divorced him and is claiming half his cash (not a spoiler alert...in my imagination )
P x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I saw a film where she fell for a guy, he happened to have money. She dumped him because he was a dick, then he decided to stop being such a nob and they got married."
Our boy Christian hasn't seen Eddie Murphy RAW has he?
Oh shit! Christian, you married her, you friggin bellend!
That pussy best be worth it, son. Is it really worth $500m. You'll be waking up in cold sweats like Eddie, screaming half, half arrrgh!
EL James should write new book 50 shades rinsed!
Anastasia seen you coming, lad! You're gonna loose at least half of your shit in the divorce court and with your narcissistic lack of self awareness, you wont even know whats going on.
Hasn't Chris got any mates? Saying mate, don't marry her, she's a gold digging bint, she only wants you for your money.
No pussy is worth $500m, No Pussy!
He sounds like an absolute mug, he gets what he deserves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I saw a film where she fell for a guy, he happened to have money. She dumped him because he was a dick, then he decided to stop being such a nob and they got married.
Our boy Christian hasn't seen Eddie Murphy RAW has he?
Oh shit! Christian, you married her, you friggin bellend!
That pussy best be worth it, son. Is it really worth $500m. You'll be waking up in cold sweats like Eddie, screaming half, half arrrgh!
EL James should write new book 50 shades rinsed!
Anastasia seen you coming, lad! You're gonna loose at least half of your shit in the divorce court and with your narcissistic lack of self awareness, you wont even know whats going on.
Hasn't Chris got any mates? Saying mate, don't marry her, she's a gold digging bint, she only wants you for your money.
No pussy is worth $500m, No Pussy!
He sounds like an absolute mug, he gets what he deserves."
You do know this doesn't actually happen don't you?
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"EL James should write new book 50 shades rinsed!
You do know this doesn't actually happen don't you?
"
Yeah, just giving EL a massive hint. Chris has lost all his bad boy credentials by buying Anastasia a ring. 50 shades pussywhipped could be pretty funny. |
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"Can I just say something.. it's just a film. It's not real and if it normalises BDSM (in any way shape or form, even if it is done badly which we all know to be true ) then it can only be a good thing.
Plus you can't deny Jamie Dornan is worth the watch alone
P x "
Hey, if I walk home from the pub and find a single shoe in the street and it happens to fit me, I do not necessarily assume that I will be rescued by a prince from my sad lonely life, do I?
I can understand why the genuine BDSM followers may not be so happy with the book/ film and I can also see why the newcomers find it fascinating.
For me (and as I say I have not read the books or seen any of the films yet) it is just a way of allowing a topic to be discussed rather than it being looked and frowned upon as "not healthy" or "abnormal". That's all really.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Can I just say something.. it's just a film. It's not real and if it normalises BDSM (in any way shape or form, even if it is done badly which we all know to be true ) then it can only be a good thing.
Plus you can't deny Jamie Dornan is worth the watch alone
P x Hey, if I walk home from the pub and find a single shoe in the street and it happens to fit me, I do not necessarily assume that I will be rescued by a prince from my sad lonely life, do I?
I can understand why the genuine BDSM followers may not be so happy with the book/ film and I can also see why the newcomers find it fascinating.
For me (and as I say I have not read the books or seen any of the films yet) it is just a way of allowing a topic to be discussed rather than it being looked and frowned upon as "not healthy" or "abnormal". That's all really.
"
Oh I agree totally. It's not what BDSM is about but you're right, if it means it's talked about in a more positive way instead of hidden away then thumbs up to it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Give it a week and Fab will be filled with new members...
I'll be your Mr Grey etc etc
"
Precisely...and how many of them will have done even the slightest bit of research into BDSM?
The majority will likely be desperate blokes who think that all you need to do to be a Dom or Master is go to Ann Summers or Love Honey and buy a 'Bondage Starter Pack'...
Cue a storm of 'where are all the horny bitches at?' and 'why is it so hard to find a sub slut?' forum posts... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Give it a week and Fab will be filled with new members...
I'll be your Mr Grey etc etc
Precisely...and how many of them will have done even the slightest bit of research into BDSM?
The majority will likely be desperate blokes who think that all you need to do to be a Dom or Master is go to Ann Summers or Love Honey and buy a 'Bondage Starter Pack'...
Cue a storm of 'where are all the horny bitches at?' and 'why is it so hard to find a sub slut?' forum posts... "
It happened last time when 50 Shades first came out... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It happened last time when 50 Shades first came out..."
I've seen girls on other sites asking if guys will be Christian Grey when the first film came out a few years ago. So anytime a film or book like that comes out, you will get all kinds of people joining and/or changing profiles, to fit the current dating/sexual zeitgeist. |
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Mr Boson
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