FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I'd like you to know you're rather nice.
I'd like you to know you're rather nice.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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No this isn't me asking for a friend, rather a case of me posing a question!
In a time where it's evident, that advances can on occasions make people uncomfortable and are at times inappropriate, how easy it for folk to let others know they're appreciated with no apparent agenda.
Have the days of the opposite sex commenting on someone looking lovely gone? Should we just stay quiet, or is it a rather grand gesture to boost ones ego with no hidden agenda? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A compliment is a compliment and it's wonderful to receive one.
I would be inclined to give honest compliments with no hidden agenda to either sex. It's definitely doesn't mean I want anything in return  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s always nice to have a compliment from anyone, it gives you a bit of a boost in confidence sometimes if you are feeling a little insecure about yourself.
Geeky x |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
It's tricky, and I think it always has been. Gushing compliments are never received well in the UK and, for the most part, it is standard to brush any compliment aside.
Where there is a power dynamic the compliment can be used to exercise power or be received as an exercise of power.
When it's about how you look then the context can be important and understanding that some individuals have a complex relationship with how they look can affect how it is received.
Be genuine and light in bestowing compliments and don't be creepy.
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"I think context is a massive factor in how a compliment is received by a person. "
Yes!
A genuine "you look really nice in that" with a smile is fine in my book. A leer and a "that dress makes your tits look great" or "those trousers make your cock look big" isn't unless you know your audience. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I tell women at work if I think they look nice. Usually while passing in a corridor because it feels less weird as they just keep walking while saying thank you. Seems to make people smile. I sometimes tell men something like I like their shirt but I'm careful how I say it. Again usually as I'm speed walking past them. |
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I've told people in the street they look nice. People in shops and restaurants and other public places have told me I look nice with one or two exceptions they've all been non pervy and comments made in passing and mostly women.
I think we need to be careful not to take being careful too far.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think context is a massive factor in how a compliment is received by a person.
Yes!
A genuine "you look really nice in that" with a smile is fine in my book. A leer and a "that dress makes your tits look great" or "those trousers make your cock look big" isn't unless you know your audience."
Of course, as you so rightly point out,context is everything.
But is it difficult to compliment a stranger without creeping them out?
Recently a lady served me food in a cafe and smiled telling me I had lovely eyes. That was it, she promptly left, no motive other than a kind comment which did leave a fuzzy feeling.
Then whilst in London recently, I was being served by a young lady who I thought was very pleasant and attractive. There was no sexual intention from me, but I knew any comment may make her uncomfortable. I simply commented on her name and nice accent and politely left. |
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"I think context is a massive factor in how a compliment is received by a person.
Yes!
A genuine "you look really nice in that" with a smile is fine in my book. A leer and a "that dress makes your tits look great" or "those trousers make your cock look big" isn't unless you know your audience.
Of course, as you so rightly point out,context is everything.
But is it difficult to compliment a stranger without creeping them out?
Recently a lady served me food in a cafe and smiled telling me I had lovely eyes. That was it, she promptly left, no motive other than a kind comment which did leave a fuzzy feeling.
Then whilst in London recently, I was being served by a young lady who I thought was very pleasant and attractive. There was no sexual intention from me, but I knew any comment may make her uncomfortable. I simply commented on her name and nice accent and politely left."
It's very difficult man to woman. I think you judged it correctly. |
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My hairdresser is always saying things like "you're gorgeous" or "take a seat beautiful".
I don't take offence because I know he says it to everyone, doesn't really mean it and is gay. If I had an appointment with a solicitor and they spoke like that I'd leave. |
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Compliments are fine depending on when and where. I think some discretion needs to be applied.
For example a man can appear creepy if he stops a woman in the street telling her how lovely she is.
Choose your time and moment. |
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take it as a compliment.
A friend once told me I could look good if I had money 