FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > isn't it sad that
isn't it sad that
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We become cynical of people's honesty within the internet "dating" genre. This is a broad subject re profiles but my example is:
I cannot become excited of planned meets anymore because the majority don't occur. I'm not on about getting stood up but the fantasists that don't finalise arrangements or confirm on the day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm planning on fulfilling all my fantasies.
But I agree op, if a few were upfront and honest with me at the start, I may have been able to respond better in some situations. Fantasists are still fun memories, it's the other half of that memory that just never happened. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Maine the fantasy is better than reality for them lol.
The wank is cheaper than the petrol/hotel? "
There will be numerous reasons but I'm not giving a shit about that, just missing the premeet excitement cos of these "wankers".
I know I'm not alone. |
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By *icearmsMan
over a year ago
KIDLINGTON |
I guess it's because this and similar sites get a fair bit of attention in the media..the knock on effect being that some of the fantasists joim up and make the whole meeting of like minded people a bit more difficult.
I've had people where you think it's going well and then they disappear when you talk about meeting like we all have.
I guess we just have to learn to not get too expectant so that when somethinf good does happen we enjoy it more.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have very very low expectations. I still get disappointed. 
Wanking is more fun. (( ))
Well, if you have really low expectations, I might be just the right man for you. LOL"
As long as you have very low expectations too...  |
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"I have very very low expectations. I still get disappointed.
Wanking is more fun. (())
Well, if you have really low expectations, I might be just the right man for you. LOL
As long as you have very low expectations too... "
Any one who can handle a bauble like that's got to be good at something.  he he |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
You know things are bad when you have a rare free evening & have chosen vanilla dinner & cinema over a club or trying to find a likeminded soul. 
The phrase "I can't be arsed" Is getting heard quite a lot in these parts..
Oh well, site supporters up in five days.
S
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"The trick is sussing them out. Wanking is fun. I don't understand why people get annoyed at people wanking. "
Op, means she gets annoyed because a lot of the chat or thinking time is devoted to sussuing them out. And then, pre-meet is more thoughts of 'are they real / are they going to no-show' , rather than nervous excitement and building up to the meet.
People wanking is fine, just don't waste other peoples time, making plans that are never going to happen. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The trick is sussing them out. Wanking is fun. I don't understand why people get annoyed at people wanking.
Op, means she gets annoyed because a lot of the chat or thinking time is devoted to sussuing them out. And then, pre-meet is more thoughts of 'are they real / are they going to no-show' , rather than nervous excitement and building up to the meet.
People wanking is fine, just don't waste other peoples time, making plans that are never going to happen."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well this is all very depressing, on behalf male fabbers everywhere I apologise for those amongst our ranks who have disappointed you, let you down or for whatever reason failed to leave you frothing at the gash.
Now cheer up and go get that cock, it's fucking Christmas! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well this is all very depressing, on behalf male fabbers everywhere I apologise for those amongst our ranks who have disappointed you, let you down or for whatever reason failed to leave you frothing at the gash.
Now cheer up and go get that cock, it's fucking Christmas!"
 if only it was easy as that (when you don't want to lower standards/ keep within preferences).
Only 1/4 meets came to fruition last week. All were pencilled in (dates arranged, awaiting times or confirmation). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maine the fantasy is better than reality for them lol.
The wank is cheaper than the petrol/hotel?
There will be numerous reasons but I'm not giving a shit about that, just missing the premeet excitement cos of these "wankers".
I know I'm not alone."
Yes. I reckon most prefer the chase than the catch. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well this is all very depressing, on behalf male fabbers everywhere I apologise for those amongst our ranks who have disappointed you, let you down or for whatever reason failed to leave you frothing at the gash.
Now cheer up and go get that cock, it's fucking Christmas!
if only it was easy as that (when you don't want to lower standards/ keep within preferences).
Only 1/4 meets came to fruition last week. All were pencilled in (dates arranged, awaiting times or confirmation)."
Maybe arranging 4 meets in a week isn't helping. Personally if I knew someone I had arranged a meet with had 3 others arranged in the same week or I even had a suspicion I wasn't their sole focus in the run up then I would probably lose interest.
I may not be typical of a fab single male but I like to be made to feel a bit special. |
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"We become cynical of people's honesty within the internet "dating" genre. This is a broad subject re profiles but my example is:
I cannot become excited of planned meets anymore because the majority don't occur. I'm not on about getting stood up but the fantasists that don't finalise arrangements or confirm on the day."
Yes totally get that. The exciting build up has been replaced by expectations of the person going quiet or pulling out. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Well this is all very depressing, on behalf male fabbers everywhere I apologise for those amongst our ranks who have disappointed you, let you down or for whatever reason failed to leave you frothing at the gash.
Now cheer up and go get that cock, it's fucking Christmas!
if only it was easy as that (when you don't want to lower standards/ keep within preferences).
Only 1/4 meets came to fruition last week. All were pencilled in (dates arranged, awaiting times or confirmation).
Maybe arranging 4 meets in a week isn't helping. Personally if I knew someone I had arranged a meet with had 3 others arranged in the same week or I even had a suspicion I wasn't their sole focus in the run up then I would probably lose interest.
I may not be typical of a fab single male but I like to be made to feel a bit special."
It was my birthday week. . I don't normally. Now if i was to give stats for the entire year, it'd be a similar or worse story. |
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I'm sure most of the guys on her have had far more let downs and no shows than any of the women on this thread (although I'm sure someone will try and tell me otherwise). Life can be disappointing and a bit of a let down sometimes, you just have to deal with it. It's really simple.
Some will, some won't; so what. Next.
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By *ineMan
over a year ago
In cave behind a waterfall on a hill |
I always travel in hope but usually try to make sure that the other is going to turn up but nothing is ever guaranteed until we are in the same place at the same time.
Maybe I've been lucky but those who are fantasists often seem to disappear in the days before rather than on the day...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'm sure most of the guys on her have had far more let downs and no shows than any of the women on this thread (although I'm sure someone will try and tell me otherwise). Life can be disappointing and a bit of a let down sometimes, you just have to deal with it. It's really simple.
Some will, some won't; so what. Next.
"
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only 1/4 meets came to fruition last week. All were pencilled in (dates arranged, awaiting times or confirmation)."
1 out of 4 in a week is still better than some people.
I just think we need some fresh new users. The community has become jaded and stale. We need some enthusiasm in here. |
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"Only 1/4 meets came to fruition last week. All were pencilled in (dates arranged, awaiting times or confirmation).
1 out of 4 in a week is still better than some people.
I just think we need some fresh new users. The community has become jaded and stale. We need some enthusiasm in here."
Or less users! I think a lot of the influx of new ones like the idea, but not going through with it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only 1/4 meets came to fruition last week. All were pencilled in (dates arranged, awaiting times or confirmation).
1 out of 4 in a week is still better than some people.
I just think we need some fresh new users. The community has become jaded and stale. We need some enthusiasm in here.
Or less users! I think a lot of the influx of new ones like the idea, but not going through with it."
The problem with less is that after a while you have either been fucked or rejected by everyone in your preference. |
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"Maine the fantasy is better than reality for them lol.
The wank is cheaper than the petrol/hotel?
There will be numerous reasons but I'm not giving a shit about that, just missing the premeet excitement cos of these "wankers".
I know I'm not alone.Yes. I reckon most prefer the chase than the catch."
Also i think some find it an ego boost. It's the knowing that they could have, but due to being married they'll never intend to meet. |
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"
1 out of 4 in a week is still better than some people.
I just think we need some fresh new users. The community has become jaded and stale. We need some enthusiasm in here.
Or less users! I think a lot of the influx of new ones like the idea, but not going through with it.
The problem with less is that after a while you have either been fucked or rejected by everyone in your preference. "
You are allowed to fuck them again 
What I meant to get across I suppose, is it depends who is joining and bumping the numbers up. A less number of members, but who actually meet and don't let people down, would be better than just filling up with dreamers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
1 out of 4 in a week is still better than some people.
I just think we need some fresh new users. The community has become jaded and stale. We need some enthusiasm in here.
Or less users! I think a lot of the influx of new ones like the idea, but not going through with it.
The problem with less is that after a while you have either been fucked or rejected by everyone in your preference.
You are allowed to fuck them again
What I meant to get across I suppose, is it depends who is joining and bumping the numbers up. A less number of members, but who actually meet and don't let people down, would be better than just filling up with dreamers."
Every so often a dreamer will tip over the edge to becoming a meeter. Still need a few of them |
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"
1 out of 4 in a week is still better than some people.
I just think we need some fresh new users. The community has become jaded and stale. We need some enthusiasm in here.
Or less users! I think a lot of the influx of new ones like the idea, but not going through with it.
The problem with less is that after a while you have either been fucked or rejected by everyone in your preference.
You are allowed to fuck them again
What I meant to get across I suppose, is it depends who is joining and bumping the numbers up. A less number of members, but who actually meet and don't let people down, would be better than just filling up with dreamers.
Every so often a dreamer will tip over the edge to becoming a meeter. Still need a few of them "
How about those of us who dream first then meet? I'm happy enough to dream of meeting now, it's up to you if my dream turns real. |
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"
The problem with less is that after a while you have either been fucked or rejected by everyone in your preference.
You are allowed to fuck them again
What I meant to get across I suppose, is it depends who is joining and bumping the numbers up. A less number of members, but who actually meet and don't let people down, would be better than just filling up with dreamers.
Every so often a dreamer will tip over the edge to becoming a meeter. Still need a few of them "
Absolutely! Not saying people should be diving in head first. People need to go at their own pace. |
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I'm just too busy with my studies, too much of the time now, so get less disappointed by others - they're fed up asking for meets.
I trust people appropriately but am unable to expect anything other than I've seen live on cam. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can't get my head around dreamers and fantasists. I was stood up twice in July and it's so infuriating because they get away with it. My free time is precious and it also makes me feel like such a fool to give someone my trust, only to be probably laughed at. We highlight the negatives on here because we are cross but there are some really lovely people here and in 2018, I'm damn well going to meet them
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can't get my head around dreamers and fantasists. I was stood up twice in July and it's so infuriating because they get away with it. My free time is precious and it also makes me feel like such a fool to give someone my trust, only to be probably laughed at. We highlight the negatives on here because we are cross but there are some really lovely people here and in 2018, I'm damn well going to meet them
"
I read so many people say they get stood up and I really don't get it, I must be very lucky as I've never had it happen to me and tbh never even worried that it might do. If it happened to me with any regularity it really would have put me off meeting.
I think maybe I'm such a slow mover that the weeks of boring chit chat before I commit to meeting someone gives the flaky ones plenty of time to bail before it ever gets to the meeting part.
It makes me wonder what others vetting process is and how well they get to know someone before arranging a meet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Which is why I don't engage in fantasy talk or pic swaps.
I don't either. The fantasists I'm talking about are those who fantasise about meeting."
They pretend they want to meet to get conversation they wouldn't otherwise get. Same as wankers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People who work in offices get bored during working hours (or they can't be bothered to do their work) and look for someone to occupy them until home time. |
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By *ineMan
over a year ago
In cave behind a waterfall on a hill |
"
1 out of 4 in a week is still better than some people.
I just think we need some fresh new users. The community has become jaded and stale. We need some enthusiasm in here.
Or less users! I think a lot of the influx of new ones like the idea, but not going through with it.
The problem with less is that after a while you have either been fucked or rejected by everyone in your preference.
You are allowed to fuck them again
What I meant to get across I suppose, is it depends who is joining and bumping the numbers up. A less number of members, but who actually meet and don't let people down, would be better than just filling up with dreamers.
Every so often a dreamer will tip over the edge to becoming a meeter. Still need a few of them "
I dream of a meeter |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can't get my head around dreamers and fantasists. I was stood up twice in July and it's so infuriating because they get away with it. My free time is precious and it also makes me feel like such a fool to give someone my trust, only to be probably laughed at. We highlight the negatives on here because we are cross but there are some really lovely people here and in 2018, I'm damn well going to meet them
I read so many people say they get stood up and I really don't get it, I must be very lucky as I've never had it happen to me and tbh never even worried that it might do. If it happened to me with any regularity it really would have put me off meeting.
I think maybe I'm such a slow mover that the weeks of boring chit chat before I commit to meeting someone gives the flaky ones plenty of time to bail before it ever gets to the meeting part.
It makes me wonder what others vetting process is and how well they get to know someone before arranging a meet. "
I've never been stood up either but I sort a social within 2 weeks of first contact. Maybe we're just good at putting off the flakes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can't get my head around dreamers and fantasists. I was stood up twice in July and it's so infuriating because they get away with it. My free time is precious and it also makes me feel like such a fool to give someone my trust, only to be probably laughed at. We highlight the negatives on here because we are cross but there are some really lovely people here and in 2018, I'm damn well going to meet them
I read so many people say they get stood up and I really don't get it, I must be very lucky as I've never had it happen to me and tbh never even worried that it might do. If it happened to me with any regularity it really would have put me off meeting.
I think maybe I'm such a slow mover that the weeks of boring chit chat before I commit to meeting someone gives the flaky ones plenty of time to bail before it ever gets to the meeting part.
It makes me wonder what others vetting process is and how well they get to know someone before arranging a meet. "
Well lucky you to entice the ladies with your boring chit chat and never get stood up. My vetting process is clearly flawed. I suppose trying to arrange casual sex at my age is the beginning of the end, transient and unsustainable? I'm a bloody Chatterbox and thought I had great intuition. I probably should gracefully and respectfully leave and accept that Swinging is not for oldies! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can't get my head around dreamers and fantasists. I was stood up twice in July and it's so infuriating because they get away with it. My free time is precious and it also makes me feel like such a fool to give someone my trust, only to be probably laughed at. We highlight the negatives on here because we are cross but there are some really lovely people here and in 2018, I'm damn well going to meet them
I read so many people say they get stood up and I really don't get it, I must be very lucky as I've never had it happen to me and tbh never even worried that it might do. If it happened to me with any regularity it really would have put me off meeting.
I think maybe I'm such a slow mover that the weeks of boring chit chat before I commit to meeting someone gives the flaky ones plenty of time to bail before it ever gets to the meeting part.
It makes me wonder what others vetting process is and how well they get to know someone before arranging a meet.
Well lucky you to entice the ladies with your boring chit chat and never get stood up. My vetting process is clearly flawed. I suppose trying to arrange casual sex at my age is the beginning of the end, transient and unsustainable? I'm a bloody Chatterbox and thought I had great intuition. I probably should gracefully and respectfully leave and accept that Swinging is not for oldies! "
I wasn't having a go!, I'm just curious about all the people getting stood up when that's not been my experience.
I presumed I was just lucky not to get stood up but I wondered what other people do before a meet and if there's something I maybe did differently and it's not just luck.
There's no need to be defensive, I have no idea about your vetting process but I am curious what others do. There's no reason you shouldn't be able to arrange meets at your age imo (I actually have no idea of your age as I write this but have looked at your pictures ) |
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