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Help needed ..............

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I have been attacked by some starving hungry thing that bit me to death two days ago ................. am on double antibiotics cos the bites are all infected, am dosed up to the eyeballs with antihistamine ......... and the bites are itching like hell, have been told if the antibiotics don't work I am heading for a stay in hospital on an intravenous drip ........... the itching is doing my head in, the swelling it unbelievable and I need my mind taken off it all ................... be as daft as you like but please please amuse me ........................

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Cause I like you so much I'm willing to suck all the poison out, but on this occasion I will have to spit

Hope your feeling better soon it sounds horrendous xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ice bath!

If it doesn't help the swelling reduce it will at least distract you thinking up lots of new swear words as you lower yourself in

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Aww sounds awful, have to tried to put some calamine lotion on?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Frozen peas, I hate cold things on me but when the itching gets really bad it's either rip your skin off or ice packs

Hope you get distracted soon

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Was it a fruit bat, if so is it still hanging upside down under your ass ? Tempt it away with some sliced oranges.

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By *odareyouMan  over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

Nurses aren't supposed to laugh...

"Of course I won't laugh," said the nurse. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."

"Okay then," said Fred, and he proceeded to drop his trousers. Revealing the tiniest 'man thingy' the nurse had ever seen. Length and width, it couldn't have been bigger than the a AAA battery. Unable to control herself, the nurse started giggling, then fell to the floor laughing.

Ten minutes later she was able to struggle to her feet and regain her composure.

"I am so sorry," she said. "I don't know what came over me. On my honour as a nurse and a lady, I promise it won't happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?'

..."It's swollen," Fred replied.

Get better soon minxie,, least its not man flu,,

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman  over a year ago

Deviant City


"Aww sounds awful, have to tried to put some calamine lotion on? "

I'd suggest this too if not already tried. Hope it starts to improve soon xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Aww sounds awful, have to tried to put some calamine lotion on? "

I have hydrocortisone cream as well - forgot that bit .......... and yeah I am using it .............. grrrrrrrrrr I am gonna have to do keyboarding all day to stop me itching em, so be prepared for some stupidity on here

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester

Cock pic in your mail

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Nurses aren't supposed to laugh...

"Of course I won't laugh," said the nurse. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient."

"Okay then," said Fred, and he proceeded to drop his trousers. Revealing the tiniest 'man thingy' the nurse had ever seen. Length and width, it couldn't have been bigger than the a AAA battery. Unable to control herself, the nurse started giggling, then fell to the floor laughing.

Ten minutes later she was able to struggle to her feet and regain her composure.

"I am so sorry," she said. "I don't know what came over me. On my honour as a nurse and a lady, I promise it won't happen again. Now, tell me, what seems to be the problem?'

..."It's swollen," Fred replied.

Get better soon minxie,, least its not man flu,, "

love it and yeah am laughing and thank u

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By *renchbambi xWoman  over a year ago

Need to know basis


"Frozen peas, I hate cold things on me but when the itching gets really bad it's either rip your skin off or ice packs

Hope you get distracted soon "

One frozen pea on each bite...then I'll have to post the pic as my avatar

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By *tomComMan  over a year ago

Wellingborough

You are not alone. I know 2 other people in the last week that seem to have been bitten by something and their foot or leg has swollen up for days.

Not sure if it is a new insect the UK causing the issue.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Frozen peas, I hate cold things on me but when the itching gets really bad it's either rip your skin off or ice packs

Hope you get distracted soon

One frozen pea on each bite...then I'll have to post the pic as my avatar "

one bite would need the whole pack they are that big I'll send u a pic

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By *ce WingerMan  over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

I have some special cream that I could rub in for you

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You are not alone. I know 2 other people in the last week that seem to have been bitten by something and their foot or leg has swollen up for days.

Not sure if it is a new insect the UK causing the issue."

trust it to find me!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I have some special cream that I could rub in for you "

would that be the same cream offered to sort out my hayfever? lol

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By *odareyouMan  over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)

Did you hear the joke about a dirty phone call,?

A wife answers the phone,, on the other end theres a deep breath then the voice says " is your tw*t,,,," heavy breath,, " unshaven,,,?" deep breath ,," and smelly,,?"

Wife says " just a minute he s asleep on the couch,,!!"

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Did you hear the joke about a dirty phone call,?

A wife answers the phone,, on the other end theres a deep breath then the voice says " is your tw*t,,,," heavy breath,, " unshaven,,,?" deep breath ,," and smelly,,?"

Wife says " just a minute he s asleep on the couch,,!!" "

love it

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

There is now a pic on here of my leg ............. if anyone is brave enough to look lol and I just noted the little twatting whatever it was that bit took a chunk out my tattoo as well - this is soooo not a good look

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By *odareyouMan  over a year ago

not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds)


"I have some special cream that I could rub in for you

would that be the same cream offered to sort out my hayfever? lol "

I went to a bukkake meeting at the weekend.

Well I say meeting, it was more a coming together,,

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Cock pic in your mail "

how bitterly disappointing

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Looks like cellulitis, got bit by a horse fly few years back,.could watch the inflamation spread.

On normal bites I use vinegar to neutralise it,.if it dont work at least im good enough to eat

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Looks like cellulitis, got bit by a horse fly few years back,.could watch the inflamation spread.

On normal bites I use vinegar to neutralise it,.if it dont work at least im good enough to eat "

its literally the poison from the bites, my arms are the same ........... and everywhere else where the fucker got me!!! and I can watch it spread too ....... how long before something starts working nursey???

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have been attacked by some starving hungry thing that bit me to death two days ago ................. am on double antibiotics cos the bites are all infected, am dosed up to the eyeballs with antihistamine ......... and the bites are itching like hell, have been told if the antibiotics don't work I am heading for a stay in hospital on an intravenous drip ........... the itching is doing my head in, the swelling it unbelievable and I need my mind taken off it all ................... be as daft as you like but please please amuse me ........................ "

OH BLIMEY minx not ANOTHER trauma in ya life

I think it's seriously time we considered keeping you in an hermetically sealed environment n wearing thick NHS issue mittens u r a walking disaster zone lol

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By *ire_bladeMan  over a year ago

Manchester


"Cock pic in your mail

how bitterly disappointing "

pmsl an thats before you get it

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By *oulou45Woman  over a year ago

Bucks

Trust u minxy , was going to say could be a horse fly, nasty buggas. Lacto calomine is good. Hope they heal soon x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Looks like cellulitis, got bit by a horse fly few years back,.could watch the inflamation spread.

On normal bites I use vinegar to neutralise it,.if it dont work at least im good enough to eat

its literally the poison from the bites, my arms are the same ........... and everywhere else where the fucker got me!!! and I can watch it spread too ....... how long before something starts working nursey??? "

Antibiotics take a few days to get into the system, the steriod cream will help the inflamation,.and the piriton help the itch

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I have been attacked by some starving hungry thing that bit me to death two days ago ................. am on double antibiotics cos the bites are all infected, am dosed up to the eyeballs with antihistamine ......... and the bites are itching like hell, have been told if the antibiotics don't work I am heading for a stay in hospital on an intravenous drip ........... the itching is doing my head in, the swelling it unbelievable and I need my mind taken off it all ................... be as daft as you like but please please amuse me ........................

OH BLIMEY minx not ANOTHER trauma in ya life

I think it's seriously time we considered keeping you in an hermetically sealed environment n wearing thick NHS issue mittens u r a walking disaster zone lol "

I can see a flaw in your thinking here ........... if it is hermetically sealed there would be a lack of oxygen ......... that thought was not nice now was it !!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Looks like cellulitis, got bit by a horse fly few years back,.could watch the inflamation spread.

On normal bites I use vinegar to neutralise it,.if it dont work at least im good enough to eat

its literally the poison from the bites, my arms are the same ........... and everywhere else where the fucker got me!!! and I can watch it spread too ....... how long before something starts working nursey???

Antibiotics take a few days to get into the system, the steriod cream will help the inflamation,.and the piriton help the itch"

then everything is failing spectacularly ........ have been on three lots of antihistamines since Monday and the itch is intense ............... and antibiotics - two days out of seven now .........and its spreading ........ god I wish I was normal

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By *renchbambi xWoman  over a year ago

Need to know basis

A bubble around you is what you need!! And to change your washing up powder/liquid...those bed bugs do bite xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I have been attacked by some starving hungry thing that bit me to death two days ago ................. am on double antibiotics cos the bites are all infected, am dosed up to the eyeballs with antihistamine ......... and the bites are itching like hell, have been told if the antibiotics don't work I am heading for a stay in hospital on an intravenous drip ........... the itching is doing my head in, the swelling it unbelievable and I need my mind taken off it all ................... be as daft as you like but please please amuse me ........................

OH BLIMEY minx not ANOTHER trauma in ya life

I think it's seriously time we considered keeping you in an hermetically sealed environment n wearing thick NHS issue mittens u r a walking disaster zone lol

I can see a flaw in your thinking here ........... if it is hermetically sealed there would be a lack of oxygen ......... that thought was not nice now was it !!!! "

Oh yes lol forgot u would possibly want to breathe haha. Maybe we could issue u with an aqaulung - so long as u don't start tampering with it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Herbal tablets from your pharmacy. They're called Rhus Tox. I used them on the kids when they had chicken pox xx

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By *un_JuiceCouple  over a year ago

Nr Chester

[Removed by poster at 21/06/13 11:51:55]

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By *un_JuiceCouple  over a year ago

Nr Chester

You may laugh or grimace at the thought but urine is extremely good for burns, cuts,grazed,athletes foot and many other skin irritatations

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Blimey minx just looked I had same problem couple years ago only thing that helped the itch was ice packs .hope it clears soon good luck xx

Ps don't scratch you might end up with scar xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"You may laugh or grimace at the thought but urine is extremely good for burns, cuts,grazed,athletes foot and many other skin irritatations"

I grimaced

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Blimey minx just looked I had same problem couple years ago only thing that helped the itch was ice packs .hope it clears soon good luck xx

Ps don't scratch you might end up with scar xxx"

thank u am trying so hard not to itch any of em xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Herbal tablets from your pharmacy. They're called Rhus Tox. I used them on the kids when they had chicken pox xx"

ok gonna try em

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By *renchbambi xWoman  over a year ago

Need to know basis


"A bubble around you is what you need!! And to change your washing up powder/liquid...those bed bugs do bite xx "

Not implying that you're 'dirty'...well, there are various kinds of dirty

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"A bubble around you is what you need!! And to change your washing up powder/liquid...those bed bugs do bite xx

Not implying that you're 'dirty'...well, there are various kinds of dirty "

thanks (I think)

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By *exycleanerWoman  over a year ago

pontefract

i was out walking my dogs cpl of weeks

ago in some woods then later noticed a swollen lump

on my neck .this was on sunday eve so

on monday got some TCP ye i know it stinks

put some on it neat and it soon sorted

it out .

why cant we feel em having a picnic out of us then we can get it off ??

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i was out walking my dogs cpl of weeks

ago in some woods then later noticed a swollen lump

on my neck .this was on sunday eve so

on monday got some TCP ye i know it stinks

put some on it neat and it soon sorted

it out .

why cant we feel em having a picnic out of us then we can get it off ??"

I never even saw the buggers and I was watching the bites come up .......... they are invisible me thinks

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"i was out walking my dogs cpl of weeks

ago in some woods then later noticed a swollen lump

on my neck .this was on sunday eve so

on monday got some TCP ye i know it stinks

put some on it neat and it soon sorted

it out .

why cant we feel em having a picnic out of us then we can get it off ??"

Picnic??? I think it was a full banquet

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"i was out walking my dogs cpl of weeks

ago in some woods then later noticed a swollen lump

on my neck .this was on sunday eve so

on monday got some TCP ye i know it stinks

put some on it neat and it soon sorted

it out .

why cant we feel em having a picnic out of us then we can get it off ??

I never even saw the buggers and I was watching the bites come up .......... they are invisible me thinks "

There's one little bugger that is not seen and the only effect is a bloody painful bite, like yours. The critter is a sand fly, tiny thing - gob on wings!

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By *empting Devil.Woman  over a year ago

Sheffield

try a warm (not hot) bath with plenty of bicarbanate of soda and salt in.

I know natural live yogurt takes the sting out of sunburn. No idea if it would help but surely it can't hurt to try.

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