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If you had 30 mins alone with me…

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin

What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Sleep, I'm knackered.

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

I'd tell you everything I know about...

T

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 38 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

Have a nice cup of tea and a biscuit. I make excellent tea. Plus it helps clear my mouth out after the blowjob.

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Sleep, I'm knackered."

Do I have to be quiet?

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman 38 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

Um.

Eat cupcakes and dick?

(You only have to partake in the former as long as you provide the latter)

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan 38 weeks ago

Glasgow

30 minutes? That’s barely long enough for a first pint. I’d be telling you to stay for another round.

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"I'd tell you everything I know about...

T"

….My future???

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By *izzy.Woman 38 weeks ago

Stoke area

Snog. I haven't had a good kissing session for ages

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By *rucey_BigBallsMan 38 weeks ago

London

Sink 2 pints and trade stories and opinions on the wenches in here!

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago


"Sleep, I'm knackered.

Do I have to be quiet?"

Yes, shut up!

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Um.

Eat cupcakes and dick?

(You only have to partake in the former as long as you provide the latter) "

Narrator - We see Woody frantically rummaging through his baking cupboard for ingredients and utensils as the oven is already on pre-heat….

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By *ingerSpiceBombCouple 38 weeks ago

Bedfordshire

Buy me a double gin and then we see

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"30 minutes? That’s barely long enough for a first pint. I’d be telling you to stay for another round."

Exactly…. And the answer is yes

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By *aughty Couple ABCCouple 38 weeks ago

West Bromwich

Just 30 mins?

If it's really good, can we have longer?

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Sleep, I'm knackered.

Do I have to be quiet?

Yes, shut up!"

Shouts- “ I can’t hear you, I’m in the other room!”

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By *aughty Couple ABCCouple 38 weeks ago

West Bromwich

Just 30 mins?

If it's really good, can we have longer?

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Sink 2 pints and trade stories and opinions on the wenches in here! "

2 pints??? 30 minutes not two hours

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By *obilebottomMan 38 weeks ago

All over

Get naked and run round and round the table till we were knachered, collapse on the chair, burst out lauqhing and pour ourselves a brandy and wish one another happy new year

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Buy me a double gin and then we see "

I’ve got a feeling down south they’re more expensive

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By *ddie1966Man 38 weeks ago

Paper Town Central, Essex.

Even my psycho therapist only give me 15 minutes.

You're generous

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Just 30 mins?

If it's really good, can we have longer? "

30 minutes, is always really good

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Get naked and run round and round the table till we were knachered, collapse on the chair, burst out lauqhing and pour ourselves a brandy and wish one another happy new year "

Naked naked?? do you know how cold is it?

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By *illy IdolMan 38 weeks ago

Somewhere near the middle

I'd join you for a couple of pints with the others^

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By *luebell888Woman 38 weeks ago

Glasgow

Do you have an apple pie to go with the squirty cream?.

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Do you have an apple pie to go with the squirty cream?."

Eye, I sure would for the wee lass!!

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By *obilebottomMan 38 weeks ago

All over


"Get naked and run round and round the table till we were knachered, collapse on the chair, burst out lauqhing and pour ourselves a brandy and wish one another happy new year

Naked naked?? do you know how cold is it? "

Ok, you can keep your thermals on

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By *red333Man 38 weeks ago

Dorchester


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

a microwave meal leave it to sit for 24 minutes

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By *ingerSpiceBombCouple 38 weeks ago

Bedfordshire


"Buy me a double gin and then we see

I’ve got a feeling down south they’re more expensive "

Could be worth the effort

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it a microwave meal leave it to sit for 24 minutes "

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By *ensuallover1000Man 38 weeks ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I would serenade you with romantic song before hand in hand we would stroll idly along a random deserted beach as a 1980’s film style, sexy scene, saxophone soundtrack will play mysteriously from an unknown source, over the romantic setting

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By *aitonelMan 38 weeks ago

Liverpool

Ask for a refund

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By *lphaSmegMan 38 weeks ago

St Leonards

Well, no more than two minutes showing you the places in your kitchen that are better options for storing squirty cream than the front of jeans.

Then twenty three minutes with some low-risk counselling about the whole squirty cream/jeans axis. We wouldn't go too deep in that time. No childhood stuff. Just a few coping strategies, more CBT than depth analysis, as it were.

Then I'd need the last five minutes to declutter from the counselling session, otherwise I run the risk of some squirty cream/jeans transference taking hold in my psyche.

If there were a few seconds left over, I'd say "Woody - get thee to a swingers club in '24".

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Ask for a refund "

all sales are final

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Well, no more than two minutes showing you the places in your kitchen that are better options for storing squirty cream than the front of jeans.

Then twenty three minutes with some low-risk counselling about the whole squirty cream/jeans axis. We wouldn't go too deep in that time. No childhood stuff. Just a few coping strategies, more CBT than depth analysis, as it were.

Then I'd need the last five minutes to declutter from the counselling session, otherwise I run the risk of some squirty cream/jeans transference taking hold in my psyche.

If there were a few seconds left over, I'd say "Woody - get thee to a swingers club in '24"."

I feel you might be trying to tell me something

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By *red333Man 38 weeks ago

Dorchester

Yes get to a club if sex is all you're looking for hot tubs are ideal to chat up your prey

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By *lphaSmegMan 38 weeks ago

St Leonards


"Well, no more than two minutes showing you the places in your kitchen that are better options for storing squirty cream than the front of jeans.

Then twenty three minutes with some low-risk counselling about the whole squirty cream/jeans axis. We wouldn't go too deep in that time. No childhood stuff. Just a few coping strategies, more CBT than depth analysis, as it were.

Then I'd need the last five minutes to declutter from the counselling session, otherwise I run the risk of some squirty cream/jeans transference taking hold in my psyche.

If there were a few seconds left over, I'd say "Woody - get thee to a swingers club in '24".

I feel you might be trying to tell me something "

It was all about those final few seconds Wuds .

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman 38 weeks ago

Merseyside

Well ..... for the first 5/10 mins we'd laugh n clutch ourselves n say ...... Omfgg.... ! Is that you ? OMG is it ? Jeeeeeeez you are not like I thought. I do love you though. Oh what a fucking suprise ..... Jesus ..... it's great to meet you finally ....

Then we'd get a drink and it'd go down so fast that we'd have another and then we'd say .... shit .... we've got 10 mins left ..... what shall we do ....

Then we'd just say .......well fuck me you are human .... awwwwwwww nice.

Then i'd start to leave for my train ... n we'd both go Ahhhh fuck it's all over.... Oh shitting hell .... so quick but such fun .....

Then you'd say ..... It's spoiled it all for me cos I thought you were a li'l ole lady and well .. you're not really are you ... well your old but you know ..... not a typical old lady like...

N i'd say ... quit while you're ahead Woody and then we'd go ....

Ahahahahahah Ahahahahaha Ahahahahaah

And wave till my train was out of site.

Then you'd go home for a happy wank. Not cos of me but cos of the adrenalin of course....

N that's it.

Done.

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Well ..... for the first 5/10 mins we'd laugh n clutch ourselves n say ...... Omfgg.... ! Is that you ? OMG is it ? Jeeeeeeez you are not like I thought. I do love you though. Oh what a fucking suprise ..... Jesus ..... it's great to meet you finally ....

Then we'd get a drink and it'd go down so fast that we'd have another and then we'd say .... shit .... we've got 10 mins left ..... what shall we do ....

Then we'd just say .......well fuck me you are human .... awwwwwwww nice.

Then i'd start to leave for my train ... n we'd both go Ahhhh fuck it's all over.... Oh shitting hell .... so quick but such fun .....

Then you'd say ..... It's spoiled it all for me cos I thought you were a li'l ole lady and well .. you're not really are you ... well your old but you know ..... not a typical old lady like...

N i'd say ... quit while you're ahead Woody and then we'd go ....

Ahahahahahah Ahahahahaha Ahahahahaah

And wave till my train was out of site.

Then you'd go home for a happy wank. Not cos of me but cos of the adrenalin of course....

N that's it.

Done."

Is it wrong that I read that in the style off Vicky Polard.

*I love md all if it GC

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman 38 weeks ago

Merseyside

Woody ........ No. Not Vicky Pollard No. I said NO.

Love her ... but look like her ? NOOOO talk like her NOOOOOOOOOOO

Just No No .....

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Woody ........ No. Not Vicky Pollard No. I said NO.

Love her ... but look like her ? NOOOO talk like her NOOOOOOOOOOO

Just No No ..... "

Whatever…Shut it ! Why are you givin’ me evils!?! I never even said nuffin about nuffin …

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By *ookie46Woman 38 weeks ago

Deepest darkest Peru

Drink beer and chat shit

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By *oo..Woman 38 weeks ago

Boo's World

Play several rounds of Air Hockey and see who wins (me obviously)

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Drink beer and chat shit "

I really could do with this actually.

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Play several rounds of Air Hockey and see who wins (me obviously)"

You know you’re talking crazy talk now!!!

BRING IT ON!!!

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By *ools and the brainCouple 38 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

My back needs shaving.

Mr

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By *oo..Woman 38 weeks ago

Boo's World


"Play several rounds of Air Hockey and see who wins (me obviously)

You know you’re talking crazy talk now!!!

BRING IT ON!!! "

You're going down!! Ha ha

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Play several rounds of Air Hockey and see who wins (me obviously)

You know you’re talking crazy talk now!!!

BRING IT ON!!!

You're going down!! Ha ha "

Sounds hot!

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple 38 weeks ago

Leeds

I like you woody, you can come over to my house and fuck my sister.

The mr

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By *ittlebirdWoman 38 weeks ago

Somewhere only we know


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

Mario kart competition

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"I like you woody, you can come over to my house and fuck my sister.

The mr "

Sir. Yes sir!!!

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Mario kart competition "

I choose DonkeyKong.

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

"

Is BJ a cocktail?

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By *oland.Man 38 weeks ago

Norwich


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it "

***

Get d*unk and saying funnyish jokes.

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By *ittlebirdWoman 38 weeks ago

Somewhere only we know


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

Is BJ a cocktail? "

It sure is. Well it contains cock anyway

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By *inky_couple2020Couple 38 weeks ago

North West

I'll beat you at ping pong!

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

Is BJ a cocktail?

It sure is. Well it contains cock anyway "

2 for 1

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"I'll beat you at ping pong!"

Hahaha. Probably!! and sat down too.

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By *inky_couple2020Couple 38 weeks ago

North West


"I'll beat you at ping pong!

Hahaha. Probably!! and sat down too. "

I sit down for everything

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By *lowupdollTV/TS 38 weeks ago

S. Herts

Can we do this in 5 minute instalments?

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By *aurus_09Man 38 weeks ago

neverland


"Snog. I haven't had a good kissing session for ages "

Love a kissing session!

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By *ittlebirdWoman 38 weeks ago

Somewhere only we know


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

Is BJ a cocktail?

It sure is. Well it contains cock anyway

2 for 1 "

2 BJs? Oh ok then… you’ve twisted my arm

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 38 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania


"What would we do?

*this thread could go 2 ways, I’m very aware of it

Make a cuppa.

Get the biscuits out.

Offer you a chocolate hobnob.

Quickly finish the cuppa.

Head to the pub.

* There may or may not be a BJ in there too

"

Hey! That was my idea.

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By *agic johnsonMan 38 weeks ago

morden

I'd watch something really interesting with you that's 32 mins long and stop it at 30 so you don't see the end

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"I'd watch something really interesting with you that's 32 mins long and stop it at 30 so you don't see the end "

Hahaha. That’s evil!!!

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By *agic johnsonMan 38 weeks ago

morden

It would be something awesome too !!! Haha

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago


"I'd tell you everything I know about...

T

….My future??? "

Let me get the cards out

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By *eatrice BadinageWoman 38 weeks ago

In a Sparkly Dress

Have a 29 minute, mutual cuddle and hairstoke

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By (user no longer on site) 38 weeks ago

For starters I'd put the kettle on, get out the biscuits and ask how you were.

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"For starters I'd put the kettle on, get out the biscuits and ask how you were."

Coffee. No sugar. Oat milk. ….. I’m fine.

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"I'd tell you everything I know about...

T

….My future???

Let me get the cards out "

I’ve not had a tarot card reading in years

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By *oody B OP   Man 38 weeks ago

Mcr. - The Gilded Palace of Sin


"Have a 29 minute, mutual cuddle and hairstoke "

You have to get me at the right time of the day for that…. Right now, I just want coffee

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By *lphaSmegMan 38 weeks ago

St Leonards


"Have a 29 minute, mutual cuddle and hairstoke

You have to get me at the right time of the day for that…. Right now, I just want coffee"

"Can me and my 3 girlfriends have the dirtiest sex, make love, and put on a show for you now Nicky Mr Cunt? Please?" (eyelids flutter, lip gets seductively bitten).

"Uhm...sorry...no.

Coffee.

It's coffee.

Life = coffee.

Is your name coffee?

I need coffee...."

Right...I'm off for coffee too.

L8rs .

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