FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Should you ever get back with an ex?
Should you ever get back with an ex?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *hagTonight OP Man
over a year ago
From the land of haribos. |
I was watching a program about it and it was interesting, they were talking about the pros and the coins of it.
They mentioned things like an ex is an ex for a reason and also the pros like, that by going back there could be a chance that you could fix the relationship as you both have matured since the breakup. I agreed with those things too, because after the separation and years have gone by, both might have matured and so there might be a chance to rekindle the relationship again.
I also want to add that one might get back to the ex, because they havent yet found anyone else to have sexy time with and miss the company.
What is your view about it, is it a good idea to get back with your ex again? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *lynJMan
over a year ago
Morden/Faversham |
Depends on why you broke up.
I'm separated and wouldn't dream of getting back with her.
I had a gf/partner that I broke up with after a couple of years for 5 months or so. We got back together and were happy for 18 years until she died.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eartsmanMan
over a year ago
southeast , midlands, southern France |
I think it depends on the breakup,
We all sit here and so no! , but in reality when it's matters of the heart and you truly love that person, can you really say no!?
I'm not sure I could |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Hard to say anything is possible.
I think it depends on why you split up in the first place. We've been together for a very long time 35 + years so if we split up now it would be something pretty huge. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have an ex-situationship. We still talk daily and are still besties, but she says she’s happy with things as they are now, with her fella. (Except when she’s d*unk and she misses me, loves me etc  )
I would get back with her in a heartbeat, but we never ‘broke up’ in any real sense, we just kinda drifted away for a wee while.
I’d not get back with my ex-wife for a million quid. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I guess it would depend why you broke up on the first place…..sometime you’re not in the right place in life to be together and then you meet later on and have matured or whatever.
Buuuuuut the majority of the time I’d assume it should be a no |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman
over a year ago
Where would you like me? |
I don't think so for the most part. Sure, people change, they mature, the timing can be better later in life. Maybe people realise that they do actually want the other person.
I think that sometimes you're just not compatible and I don't think it's a good idea to revisit/open up for potential hurt again the majority of the time. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
Southern Wales |
Depends on why you split up really.
Moving abroad, wanting different things at a certain time in your life etc vs. being cheated on, them lying to to you, falling out of love.
For the most part I believe it is better to move forward and not look back. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai / Nottingham |
Depends why you split , sometimes it’s the situation/time, it wasn’t your time, or others, maybe regretful and egos stop you getting back together.
There’s a couple like that I missed out on , we were always in the wring countries it wasn’t working, who knows on the future maybe it could work |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *929Man
over a year ago
newcastle |
I did and it’s hard to say I regret it just because I got 7 more years as a family with my kids out of it.
Everything else was likely a mistake though after the initial few days she seemed to resent me, often rubbing in what she did and making it clear I was only there for the children. There was very happy times during those 7 years but it was still never the same as before ultimately it was a was waste of time as still ended up split up had it not been for the kids I’d have wished I’d just moved on back then in 2014 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I get doing it for the kids, but whatever reasons for the split, it’s going to create an unhealthy power dynamic.
I’ve seen folk getting back together with folk from really early relationships work out though. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *mf123Man
over a year ago
the space between spaces |
Depends on the reasons there are many types of relationships as this site kind of stands for no it likely wouldnt be the same after time away but is that such a bad thing if it failed the last time it all depends on the power that binds you |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I am inclined to say no.
I suppose to some degree it depends how it ended.
If they betrayed my trust then no. I have made exceptions in the past, it has almost always been folly.
There has been one exception where that worked. Her behaviour was affected by her MH she didn't use that as excuse, but she owned it and sought help for it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
My initial reaction was no way.
The when I thought about it there is one ex where I would consider it if they had done some work on themselves and matured emotionally.
And I think that's very much it for me. I need to have worked on myself and reached that emotional maturity along with them to go back and truly have it work out otherwise it's a flat no.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"if they had done some work on themselves and matured emotionally.
"
This is my point about the power dynamic.
If you put conditions in place then they are forever on notice.
You don’t want them how they were, you want them how you want them to be, or not at all. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hagTonight OP Man
over a year ago
From the land of haribos. |
"Depends on why you broke up.
I'm separated and wouldn't dream of getting back with her.
I had a gf/partner that I broke up with after a couple of years for 5 months or so. We got back together and were happy for 18 years until she died. "
Yes, it also depends on why one breaks up too  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I can only go by past experiences not other people's but definitely not, we are still friends (even though the kids are all adults now) but he hasn't really grown up much in the last almost 10 years we haven't been together and I just look at him now and think "nope". He problem feels the same about me tbf.
Danish x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I was watching a program about it and it was interesting, they were talking about the pros and the coins of it.
They mentioned things like an ex is an ex for a reason and also the pros like, that by going back there could be a chance that you could fix the relationship as you both have matured since the breakup. I agreed with those things too, because after the separation and years have gone by, both might have matured and so there might be a chance to rekindle the relationship again.
I also want to add that one might get back to the ex, because they havent yet found anyone else to have sexy time with and miss the company.
What is your view about it, is it a good idea to get back with your ex again?"
If you both want to.. Why not? If you go through life needlessly closing doors eventually youll run out |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I was watching a program about it and it was interesting, they were talking about the pros and the coins of it.
They mentioned things like an ex is an ex for a reason and also the pros like, that by going back there could be a chance that you could fix the relationship as you both have matured since the breakup. I agreed with those things too, because after the separation and years have gone by, both might have matured and so there might be a chance to rekindle the relationship again.
I also want to add that one might get back to the ex, because they havent yet found anyone else to have sexy time with and miss the company.
What is your view about it, is it a good idea to get back with your ex again?"
Maybe, I'm still friends with my ex gf but she lives away now. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I have an ex-situationship. We still talk daily and are still besties, but she says she’s happy with things as they are now, with her fella. (Except when she’s d*unk and she misses me, loves me etc )
I would get back with her in a heartbeat, but we never ‘broke up’ in any real sense, we just kinda drifted away for a wee while.
I’d not get back with my ex-wife for a million quid."
My best friend was an ex too! But he wouldn't play with feelings and both were happy being best friends still until he passed on this year. She's wrong to play with your feelings and disrespect her partner! If she can do that with him she would do it to you too. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hagTonight OP Man
over a year ago
From the land of haribos. |
"I think it depends on the breakup,
We all sit here and so no! , but in reality when it's matters of the heart and you truly love that person, can you really say no!?
I'm not sure I could "
Yes, it depends on the situation too |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'd go back to my ex as she was 'the one' I even asked her to marry me. It would be difficult to overcome how she treated me but I'd still like to have tried.
There are always two sides to any break up but I genuinely cared for her and would have done anything for her.
Sadly she instigated the breakup after nearly 7 years together, I feel totally betrayed. On leaving she bragged that it was easy for her said she was a cold hearted bitch and didn't care about anything or anyone and it didn't bother her to leave, it came as a complete bolt out of the blue I got no real explanation just excuses and blame.
I have tried to keep in touch but she's blocked me from every form of contact with her, completely ghosting me. I guess she's just trying to completely forget I ever existed, but I can't just wipe her out of my life.
The worst part was what she did, after notifying me by email it was over, she then set up a profile with a new guy on Fab a day later! So it was obviously all planned. All she seems interested in is pushing her boundaries and doesn't care who she crushes to achieve the attention.
One of her exes has referred to her as
Przebiegla Suka which I think is Polish for Devious Bitch which is sad as others see her in a bad light, but I guess she's brought that on herself.
There used to be a lovely, beautiful side to her, I guess love made me only see that, now I'm not sure how easily I could rebuild any trust between us, even if she wanted too, I'm so torn but I really miss her.
Odd how no matter what someone does to you, to hurt you, they are still in your heart when you genuinely loved them. Also sad how someone can so easily turn on you just because they don't get everything they want and lose control over you and find someone they can control more easily.
The theme song from Mash was very appropriate shortly after she left.
So it's a difficult question to answer if I'm honest. Its a horrible place to find yourself. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *myAndScottCouple
over a year ago
Stourport on Severn |
Me and an ex split in 2017. I completely blamed myself for the break down of it. I grew up a hell of a lot in the years that followed. Quit drinking. Quit smoking. Learnt to drive. As a few examples.
Even though I was doing ok after that relationship, I was never quite right. Like no matter what girl I met, there was always something wrong with them and I'd find a reason to fuck them off. The truth was, I just hadn't moved on. As much as I couldn't see that at the time, it's pretty plain to see now.
We got back together in 2020 after over 3 years apart. We spent maybe 9 months together.. We never seemed to find the same groove we once had. Everything just felt a bit off. She ended up moving in, just because of circumstance. That lasted a month. It was during this month where I finally saw what I needed to see all along. It wasn't just me. I could definitely be a bit of a prick, especially back in the days where drinking was a big part of my life, but she definitely had her moments. She ended up leaving after a dumb row. And it was finally over. The closure I needed all along I now had. I was sad for maybe 24 hours. Then I was relieved. Me and Amy met a few months later and are close to celebrating our 2 year anniversary.
I totally agree what most are saying, they're an ex for a reason, but I would say the positives I got from it personally, were game changing.
I don't regret anything. In fact, I'm grateful as hell for us getting back together for that short time. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *929Man
over a year ago
newcastle |
"I'd go back to my ex as she was 'the one' I even asked her to marry me. It would be difficult to overcome how she treated me but I'd still like to have tried.
There are always two sides to any break up but I genuinely cared for her and would have done anything for her.
Sadly she instigated the breakup after nearly 7 years together, I feel totally betrayed. On leaving she bragged that it was easy for her said she was a cold hearted bitch and didn't care about anything or anyone and it didn't bother her to leave, it came as a complete bolt out of the blue I got no real explanation just excuses and blame.
I have tried to keep in touch but she's blocked me from every form of contact with her, completely ghosting me. I guess she's just trying to completely forget I ever existed, but I can't just wipe her out of my life.
The worst part was what she did, after notifying me by email it was over, she then set up a profile with a new guy on Fab a day later! So it was obviously all planned. All she seems interested in is pushing her boundaries and doesn't care who she crushes to achieve the attention.
One of her exes has referred to her as
Przebiegla Suka which I think is Polish for Devious Bitch which is sad as others see her in a bad light, but I guess she's brought that on herself.
There used to be a lovely, beautiful side to her, I guess love made me only see that, now I'm not sure how easily I could rebuild any trust between us, even if she wanted too, I'm so torn but I really miss her.
Odd how no matter what someone does to you, to hurt you, they are still in your heart when you genuinely loved them. Also sad how someone can so easily turn on you just because they don't get everything they want and lose control over you and find someone they can control more easily.
The theme song from Mash was very appropriate shortly after she left.
So it's a difficult question to answer if I'm honest. Its a horrible place to find yourself."
Hang In there mate it will get better, it’s easy to forget all the bad and only remember the good straight after a break up, in time it will balance out and you will see all the bad and be glad you shot of her mate |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *mf123Man
over a year ago
the space between spaces |
"I'd go back to my ex as she was 'the one' I even asked her to marry me. It would be difficult to overcome how she treated me but I'd still like to have tried.
There are always two sides to any break up but I genuinely cared for her and would have done anything for her.
Sadly she instigated the breakup after nearly 7 years together, I feel totally betrayed. On leaving she bragged that it was easy for her said she was a cold hearted bitch and didn't care about anything or anyone and it didn't bother her to leave, it came as a complete bolt out of the blue I got no real explanation just excuses and blame.
I have tried to keep in touch but she's blocked me from every form of contact with her, completely ghosting me. I guess she's just trying to completely forget I ever existed, but I can't just wipe her out of my life.
The worst part was what she did, after notifying me by email it was over, she then set up a profile with a new guy on Fab a day later! So it was obviously all planned. All she seems interested in is pushing her boundaries and doesn't care who she crushes to achieve the attention.
One of her exes has referred to her as
Przebiegla Suka which I think is Polish for Devious Bitch which is sad as others see her in a bad light, but I guess she's brought that on herself.
There used to be a lovely, beautiful side to her, I guess love made me only see that, now I'm not sure how easily I could rebuild any trust between us, even if she wanted too, I'm so torn but I really miss her.
Odd how no matter what someone does to you, to hurt you, they are still in your heart when you genuinely loved them. Also sad how someone can so easily turn on you just because they don't get everything they want and lose control over you and find someone they can control more easily.
The theme song from Mash was very appropriate shortly after she left.
So it's a difficult question to answer if I'm honest. Its a horrible place to find yourself."
the being cut off part is hard to get your head around but if its usually because they dont want to be reminded of what they gave up i think it hurts them too regardless be it truth or bullshit otherwise why run away well at least thats how i try to put it in my mind be it a close friend family or an ex loving folks aint easy especially when it gets rejected hope you find a way to some kind of light |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'd go back to my ex as she was 'the one' I even asked her to marry me. It would be difficult to overcome how she treated me but I'd still like to have tried.
There are always two sides to any break up but I genuinely cared for her and would have done anything for her.
Sadly she instigated the breakup after nearly 7 years together, I feel totally betrayed. On leaving she bragged that it was easy for her said she was a cold hearted bitch and didn't care about anything or anyone and it didn't bother her to leave, it came as a complete bolt out of the blue I got no real explanation just excuses and blame.
I have tried to keep in touch but she's blocked me from every form of contact with her, completely ghosting me. I guess she's just trying to completely forget I ever existed, but I can't just wipe her out of my life.
The worst part was what she did, after notifying me by email it was over, she then set up a profile with a new guy on Fab a day later! So it was obviously all planned. All she seems interested in is pushing her boundaries and doesn't care who she crushes to achieve the attention.
One of her exes has referred to her as
Przebiegla Suka which I think is Polish for Devious Bitch which is sad as others see her in a bad light, but I guess she's brought that on herself.
There used to be a lovely, beautiful side to her, I guess love made me only see that, now I'm not sure how easily I could rebuild any trust between us, even if she wanted too, I'm so torn but I really miss her.
Odd how no matter what someone does to you, to hurt you, they are still in your heart when you genuinely loved them. Also sad how someone can so easily turn on you just because they don't get everything they want and lose control over you and find someone they can control more easily.
The theme song from Mash was very appropriate shortly after she left.
So it's a difficult question to answer if I'm honest. Its a horrible place to find yourself.
the being cut off part is hard to get your head around but if its usually because they dont want to be reminded of what they gave up i think it hurts them too regardless be it truth or bullshit otherwise why run away well at least thats how i try to put it in my mind be it a close friend family or an ex loving folks aint easy especially when it gets rejected hope you find a way to some kind of light "
Thank you it looks like you understand where I'm coming from. She knows me so well so knows how to hurt as much as she can just to drive me away, everything we had she's destroyed as if it never meant anything, which to her it obviously didn't as you say maybe she's feeling some remorse or maybe will one day. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'd go back to my ex as she was 'the one' I even asked her to marry me. It would be difficult to overcome how she treated me but I'd still like to have tried.
There are always two sides to any break up but I genuinely cared for her and would have done anything for her.
Sadly she instigated the breakup after nearly 7 years together, I feel totally betrayed. On leaving she bragged that it was easy for her said she was a cold hearted bitch and didn't care about anything or anyone and it didn't bother her to leave, it came as a complete bolt out of the blue I got no real explanation just excuses and blame.
I have tried to keep in touch but she's blocked me from every form of contact with her, completely ghosting me. I guess she's just trying to completely forget I ever existed, but I can't just wipe her out of my life.
The worst part was what she did, after notifying me by email it was over, she then set up a profile with a new guy on Fab a day later! So it was obviously all planned. All she seems interested in is pushing her boundaries and doesn't care who she crushes to achieve the attention.
One of her exes has referred to her as
Przebiegla Suka which I think is Polish for Devious Bitch which is sad as others see her in a bad light, but I guess she's brought that on herself.
There used to be a lovely, beautiful side to her, I guess love made me only see that, now I'm not sure how easily I could rebuild any trust between us, even if she wanted too, I'm so torn but I really miss her.
Odd how no matter what someone does to you, to hurt you, they are still in your heart when you genuinely loved them. Also sad how someone can so easily turn on you just because they don't get everything they want and lose control over you and find someone they can control more easily.
The theme song from Mash was very appropriate shortly after she left.
So it's a difficult question to answer if I'm honest. Its a horrible place to find yourself.
Hang In there mate it will get better, it’s easy to forget all the bad and only remember the good straight after a break up, in time it will balance out and you will see all the bad and be glad you shot of her mate "
Thank you for you support and advice.
Thank you also to all those who have PM'd me with kind wishes and advice/support and similar tales.
What it's made me realise is actually I have been taken for a fool, by someone who has an agenda, who's now getting her enjoyment from more extreme activities that I would never want to be dragged down into.
I believe in karma so will leave her to deal with that when it catches up with her. No I'll never forgive her for her behaviour but I'll always care! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hagTonight OP Man
over a year ago
From the land of haribos. |
"Me and an ex split in 2017. I completely blamed myself for the break down of it. I grew up a hell of a lot in the years that followed. Quit drinking. Quit smoking. Learnt to drive. As a few examples.
Even though I was doing ok after that relationship, I was never quite right. Like no matter what girl I met, there was always something wrong with them and I'd find a reason to fuck them off. The truth was, I just hadn't moved on. As much as I couldn't see that at the time, it's pretty plain to see now.
We got back together in 2020 after over 3 years apart. We spent maybe 9 months together.. We never seemed to find the same groove we once had. Everything just felt a bit off. She ended up moving in, just because of circumstance. That lasted a month. It was during this month where I finally saw what I needed to see all along. It wasn't just me. I could definitely be a bit of a prick, especially back in the days where drinking was a big part of my life, but she definitely had her moments. She ended up leaving after a dumb row. And it was finally over. The closure I needed all along I now had. I was sad for maybe 24 hours. Then I was relieved. Me and Amy met a few months later and are close to celebrating our 2 year anniversary.
I totally agree what most are saying, they're an ex for a reason, but I would say the positives I got from it personally, were game changing.
I don't regret anything. In fact, I'm grateful as hell for us getting back together for that short time. "
That is good that you dont regret anything  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Got one or two exes who, understandably, could't turn down offers of marriage or accomodation elsewhere and would love to strike up with them again if their circumstances were to change or they wanted to relive some happy memories! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Depends on the ex for me. I have one particular ex who emigrated for work. If he came back to the UK I'd be on him like white on rice. We split due to circumstance, not due to fundamental incompatibilities. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I would only consider getting back with one of my ex's.
I'm on good terms with my exes. Occasionally meet up with them for meals etc.
The things that attracted us are still there, the friendship is still there. But the reason we separated is also still there
The exception is someone who went to live abroad. I'd give her another chance if I were single. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Haha, I find couple profiles amusing, of course you'd say no, how you going to say yes, and have your current parter all worried about your ex all of a sudden out of nowhere for the day ;p
Just jesting but maybe a bit of truth to it. Personally yes I would try again with an ex. It's all down to the individual situation isn't it. You can break up for reasons and still be amicable towards one another not all x's breakup in a blaze of Hell and fire |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
|
Why would I go back into Hell??
No. I wouldn’t, I wouldn’t go back to somewhere where there was so much pain and hurt. It was good for a time, but neither of us would want to return there.
But good luck to those who think they can rekindle something, they once loved each other, maybe they could again. 
But if anyone would ask me my opinion, - nope. Don’t do it, don’t try to do it, when it doesn’t work, it will break you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *unchalMan 52 weeks ago
Dartford |
"I was watching a program about it and it was interesting, they were talking about the pros and the coins of it.
They mentioned things like an ex is an ex for a reason and also the pros like, that by going back there could be a chance that you could fix the relationship as you both have matured since the breakup. I agreed with those things too, because after the separation and years have gone by, both might have matured and so there might be a chance to rekindle the relationship again.
I also want to add that one might get back to the ex, because they havent yet found anyone else to have sexy time with and miss the company.
What is your view about it, is it a good idea to get back with your ex again?"
For a couple of hours. Sure, why not? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *NGthe2ndWoman 52 weeks ago
Here and there |
With rose tinted glasses you could say yes. Physically you may still be attracted but after a while, when the newness has worn off, surely it would be the same relationship with all it's flaws and gripes.
It's good to remind yourself sometimes of how you felt at the worst times and think if you could handle feeling like that again
I know I couldn't |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
|
"….
It's good to remind yourself sometimes of how you felt at the worst times and think if you could handle feeling like that again
I know I couldn't "
She knows.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *iguy1130Man 52 weeks ago
Caerphilly borough |
Never say never.. people change for the better and some will never change..all depends on how much you think of each other..we all make mistakes,hopefully we learn by our mistakes. It takes two to make a happy and loving relationship. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
This is an interesting question OP and usually I’d say they’re an ex for a reason, but I’m in touch with an ex from over 25 years ago and we met recently for the first time in over 18 years and can honestly say I’m now considering it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 52 weeks ago
|
"Reeks of desperation
Exs are exs for a reason "
I assume she’d want to get back with me when or if she fails to replace me.
That’s how I see someone falling for someone else when you’re in a relationship (or supposedly in one).
They looked for love somewhere else. Found it and didn’t need the other person anymore. When that fails, they often crawl back to the person that they threw away.
*just my bitter opinion. And only my side of the story. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hagTonight OP Man 49 weeks ago
From the land of haribos. |
"Why would I go back into Hell??
No. I wouldn’t, I wouldn’t go back to somewhere where there was so much pain and hurt. It was good for a time, but neither of us would want to return there.
But good luck to those who think they can rekindle something, they once loved each other, maybe they could again.
But if anyone would ask me my opinion, - nope. Don’t do it, don’t try to do it, when it doesn’t work, it will break you. "
That is good and yes, one wouldnt want to go back to that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *unchalMan 49 weeks ago
Dartford |
"I was watching a program about it and it was interesting, they were talking about the pros and the coins of it.
They mentioned things like an ex is an ex for a reason and also the pros like, that by going back there could be a chance that you could fix the relationship as you both have matured since the breakup. I agreed with those things too, because after the separation and years have gone by, both might have matured and so there might be a chance to rekindle the relationship again.
I also want to add that one might get back to the ex, because they havent yet found anyone else to have sexy time with and miss the company.
What is your view about it, is it a good idea to get back with your ex again?"
Only for melancholy sex. A sweet coda if you like. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *adMerWoman 49 weeks ago
Sandwich |
It really depends on the psychology. If they’re a narcissist, hell no! They will love bomb you and then fuck you over worse than the last time.
If they are borderline and have done some emotional healing work, then it could work.
This is assuming that you were either emotionally stable, or have also done some emotional healing work.
All my exes were narcissists, so my previous post stands in my case. I am so happy to have done lots of emotional healing work now and maybe I can find a relationship that works for me before I pass on to another life, but if I don’t I am uber glad to have started along my emotional healing path.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think a lot of people will be surprised how many successful marriages have come from relationships that broke up for a period! It's a classic anecdote. Has anyone not gone to a wedding? I know of so many!
Sometimes it's that period apart that makes you know what someone means to you.
I think a lot of people here are just thinking of *that* ex!
And I wonder sometimes if some Fab people can struggle with relationships a bit too. I might even be one.
Most 'ended' relationships with remain that way of course, but statistically I think a lot of marriages do come after reuniting. It's not inconceivable to me that those marriages may even be the stronger ones for it, especially now that around 50% of marriages end in divorce.
Do your parting early guys!
pt |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
But 'No!!' means you must never get back with an ex, per the thread title.
The whole premiss suggests that reuniting is on the cards. That means there is a reason for getting back together that is surely more relevant than the reason to split? Or why not just remain apart?
Glass half-full fabbers? Or is it glass half-empty sex all the time?
I bet there are actually people in this thread who would have never been born had their parents not rekindled their passion at some point!
pt
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 49 weeks ago
|
Depends on the situation, sometimes it's a genuine case of right person wrong time. But 9 times out of 10, an ex is an ex for a reason and those reasons you broke up will resurface eventually. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ucka39Man 49 weeks ago
Newcastle |
"But 'No!!' means you must never get back with an ex, per the thread title.
The whole premiss suggests that reuniting is on the cards. That means there is a reason for getting back together that is surely more relevant than the reason to split? Or why not just remain apart?
Glass half-full fabbers? Or is it glass half-empty sex all the time?
I bet there are actually people in this thread who would have never been born had their parents not rekindled their passion at some point!
pt
"
Id say a lot depends upon the amount of turmoil and it's not worth it. But you may live in hope |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"But 'No!!' means you must never get back with an ex, per the thread title.
The whole premiss suggests that reuniting is on the cards. That means there is a reason for getting back together that is surely more relevant than the reason to split? Or why not just remain apart?
Glass half-full fabbers? Or is it glass half-empty sex all the time?
I bet there are actually people in this thread who would have never been born had their parents not rekindled their passion at some point!
pt
Id say a lot depends upon the amount of turmoil and it's not worth it. But you may live in hope
"
actually I'm looking ahead right now
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Yes,
Yes
Hell no
Yes
Yes in a heartbeat
Too late.
Hell yes
No did once big mistake.
Yes
No no no
Yes
TBH I still talk to almost everyone of my ex's
"
I'd love to bump into someone I knew in my 20's, see how she is now. She travelled a lot and we just drifted apart. It fascinates me how many people assume that breakups are always blowouts!
It used to be said that people who haven't properly 'settled' with someone by their 40's (not including growing-apart divorces and the like), have a high chance of possessing a kind of mix of personality traits that helped this to happen. They can be be described as a sort of mix of being a little too dispassionate (in the sense of not going to deep and changing their attention pretty quickly and firmly) possibly being a touch too disagreeable (disagreeing and needing to agree a lot basically) for many people to live with, and maybe just a bit too unforgiving too to sustain a positive relationship. There can also be elements of narcissism (in the sense of not getting too close to others, only mainly yourself) and even over-spontaneity too - especially combined with having particularly high standards and wishing (possibly expecting) to find someone better. It's a like a kind recipe for being more often single than not! For a lot of people who break-up a lot anyway. (It's nothing to do with things like shyness or just not being able to find someone.)
Of course many will say, don't people today deserve exactly what they want?
It's a gamble for many (though they might not see it that way), with raising stakes as they age through life. Some people do just settle for kids and stay together for their benefit.
I think I've just been a bit unlucky personally (and sometimes a bit casual or foolhardy I admit) so I still haven't given up hope!
pt |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I was watching a program about it and it was interesting, they were talking about the pros and the coins of it.
They mentioned things like an ex is an ex for a reason and also the pros like, that by going back there could be a chance that you could fix the relationship as you both have matured since the breakup. I agreed with those things too, because after the separation and years have gone by, both might have matured and so there might be a chance to rekindle the relationship again.
I also want to add that one might get back to the ex, because they havent yet found anyone else to have sexy time with and miss the company.
What is your view about it, is it a good idea to get back with your ex again?"
My advice is: if you will regret not trying again, then yes. It's better to have tried and failed than live with what ifs. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *exbecs12Woman 38 weeks ago
Land of roman gods |
"I was watching a program about it and it was interesting, they were talking about the pros and the coins of it.
They mentioned things like an ex is an ex for a reason and also the pros like, that by going back there could be a chance that you could fix the relationship as you both have matured since the breakup. I agreed with those things too, because after the separation and years have gone by, both might have matured and so there might be a chance to rekindle the relationship again.
I also want to add that one might get back to the ex, because they havent yet found anyone else to have sexy time with and miss the company.
What is your view about it, is it a good idea to get back with your ex again?"
Hi op
Are you back with an ex for the above reasons?
Hell no. They stay as an ex. Abusive ex narcasistic ex no thanks. Battered black n blue. No way jose! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I was watching a program about it and it was interesting, they were talking about the pros and the coins of it.
They mentioned things like an ex is an ex for a reason and also the pros like, that by going back there could be a chance that you could fix the relationship as you both have matured since the breakup. I agreed with those things too, because after the separation and years have gone by, both might have matured and so there might be a chance to rekindle the relationship again.
I also want to add that one might get back to the ex, because they havent yet found anyone else to have sexy time with and miss the company.
What is your view about it, is it a good idea to get back with your ex again?"
Absolutely not |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Yes is my answer the chemistry was right if you were together for a while one stupid text was all it took to ruin it
Fred, don’t tell people about us  awwww you look better naked "
I’m about to swim home. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *pagedMan 38 weeks ago
Doncaster |
I did once it was hot to start with but didn't end well .I got to meet her mum again and sister .also her kids from her ex husband But them I found out she had slept with someone close to me when we where married |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
LvM
whether ex’s, friends or family 
